Sex without emotion - for men.

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-26-2004
Sex without emotion - for men.
73
Mon, 05-03-2004 - 4:33pm
I read another thread about men who claim that they "require" an emotional connection before they had sex, or otherwise it's no different than masterbation. I also noticed that most of that was women, who had received input from men. Well let's be real here.

The reason prostituation is a big a business as it is...is because MOST men can and would have anonomous sex with a woman. Dispite what they tell you, I know men, and I know myself. Now I dont' think they could have sex with ANY woman...but I assure you...put nearly any straight man...with a woman he finds very sexy...and if he is in a situation in which he doens't feel it will come back to bite him, or he gets caught etc....he will have sex with that woman. Now many of you I'm sure will come down on me as just speaking for myself. But I know men. Aside from being one, I've seen them in bars, strip clubs, on out of town business trips etc...... The vast majority of men (in my opinion probably 80-90%) would do it.

One of the worse things about men is they won't admit that. They will just do it.

I think our society would be much better served if guys were just more honest about their needs. And I think many women would at first be horrified...then would get used to it and realize that we are who we are. And this part of their personality in my view does NOT make them bad people.

OK....I'm ready to get BLASTED!

Dennis

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iVillage Member
Registered: 11-12-2003
Mon, 05-03-2004 - 4:39pm
i agree, as i mentioned in my post below, i recently took a poll of men i know and asked "can you hold your nose and close your eyes and basically use any warm vagina for an orgasm?" and they all, each and every one of them said "uh...yea"...as i said, many of the guys softened the blow by adding "i'm a monogomous guy" or "i prefer sex with a lover"...but they all agreed, yup, its better than masturbation.

honey

    

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-09-2003
Mon, 05-03-2004 - 4:48pm
I won't blast you....I think there's a lot of truth in what you speak.

I don't think that women are any different really. Many fantasies are about sex with strangers. In fact, it's probably the number one fantasy of many men and women. With that said, I know for a fact that my DH had refused casual sex with two women in between his LTR's...as did I. I could have had sex with many, many, men, as well as orgies and threesomes, but it just didn't appeal to me. In the right circumstances, sex can be overpowering...I just think that some of us are better at controlling it and more responsible than others. Temptation isn't exclusive to men...it's an individual thing.

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-26-2004
Mon, 05-03-2004 - 4:49pm
Honey, I saw your post, and at least those guys were honest with you. But if you read many others....they say something different. I just laughed, because women believe it because they want to believe that thier man are like that...

Ladies I think the sooner you really understand your men (those who don't) and men in general...the easier it is to get what you want from them.

It's not a matter of right and wrong. It's a matter of how things REALLY are.
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-08-2004
Mon, 05-03-2004 - 5:00pm

Hi Dennis and no, I'm not going to blast you, everyone has a right to their opinion.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 04-26-2004
Mon, 05-03-2004 - 5:02pm
I hear you freetochoose. I don't totally disagree, but I do believe that in the right situation any man would do it. And in some instances I have said no too....but I'm saything that given the right female and situation....the vast majority of men would do it. And I think a good number of women would too.

Thanks

Dennis

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-26-2004
Mon, 05-03-2004 - 5:04pm
Tish, I understand what you are saying. But in my humble opinion....you don't really understand most men. Strip clubs aside....MOST men WILL do it.

I know you (and many others) don't WANT to believe that...but I'm just trying to reveal the truth. I wish it were not true, I'm just telling you how it is.

You can speak the truth, but the listener has to want to know the truth.

Just trying to keep it real.

Dennis

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-08-2004
Mon, 05-03-2004 - 5:22pm

No Dennis, it's not something I "believe" my husband would never do, I KNOW he never would.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 10-09-2003
Mon, 05-03-2004 - 5:23pm
Well...what you're trying to assert is that men are hornier than women. I say nay to you! ;-) There's no such thing. Arousal, is arousal. Desire is Desire. With all else being equal, arousal for men is no more stronger than it is for women. If you want to claim that some men are in less control and less responsible due to social culturing, then I'd agree(not all men).
Avatar for katmandoo2001
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Mon, 05-03-2004 - 5:47pm
No one said that men wouldn't or couldn't have sex without emotional attachment, just that most men would prefer the whole package, sex WITH love.

We all know that men can and often do have sex indiscriminately. But my DH could have had sex before we were married. He had plenty of opportunities. So, why didn't he, if that's all he really wanted? Because he didn't want it to be about physical lust only. He wanted more and felt the wait would be worth it. And guess what? It was.

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-08-2004
Mon, 05-03-2004 - 6:24pm

Maybe I don't understand MOST men, but then I don't have a lot of men in my little black book to compare each other with.

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