Sexual experience in relation to size?

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-19-2005
Sexual experience in relation to size?
36
Fri, 10-14-2005 - 12:49pm
This is a question for all the men out there: I am curious if there is a correlation between the 'size' of the guy and the number of lovers they have had. I am most curious about men who are either a fair bit smaller than normal or men who are a fair bit bigger than average. I have been thinking about this because of my last two boyfriends I have one who fits into both camps.

The big guy, whose size is quite remarkable, was by far and away the most experienced boyfriend I have ever had and he had been with a huge number of women. Initially I found this surprising because he's kinda shy, about average looking and not at all aggressive with women. I had to pursue him and I’m usually the shy one! When I asked him about it I was shocked at how aggressive women were with him if they found out about his 'dimensions'. Some of his stories were truly outrageous, I mean I don't think I had ever checked out a guy 'down there' before dating this man, the way he described it some women seem to make a game of it. I could barely believe the number of truly shocking experiences he had had.

On the other hand, my current boyfriend is very small and has had even less sexual partners than I have. He did mention to me once that he had had a couple of bad experiences with previous girlfriends which he believes may have been linked to his small size. Not too surprisingly, he is insecure about this and I don't think he has ever even fooled around with a girl unless they dating pretty seriously. Typically I would respect this, but he's implied that if he was more confident (not sure if this means bigger?) he would definitely have taken advantage of some missed opportunities to become lovers with other women. Lost some points there. Anyway this is a long post, but I would really be interested in knowing from guys, especially those who are outside the normal size range of what there sexual history is.

BTW, for my age I consider myself to be somewhat experienced sexually because when I am in a relationship I will experiment and have a high libido. However, I haven't had many partners so maybe most people would consider me inexperienced.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 07-05-2005
Sun, 10-30-2005 - 1:00am

According to sizesurvey the more endowed fellows have sex with more women overall. The ratio is 2:1 (twice as many). This is of course just an overall ratio. There will be plenty of exceptions, as at times a smaller guy will have been with more women, of course.

Why is the overall ratio 2:1? Two main factors are involved - Firstly, in an overall average the added confidence of having a bigger unit. Secondly, the bigger guys will get more action at times when the women find out he's endowed. Not that looks, or personality, intelligence, or other factors don't also attract women, but the bigger unit does have it's attraction for women, especially the size queens. And even though size queens only make up a small percentage of women, I suspect that today's culture, pushing bigger and better everything mindset, has spawned some extra size queens, and that there may be more size queens than is relised this day and age. Also, at times even non size queens will caught up in letting the big guy have her in bed, as some women do have a slight preference for bigger, without being size queens. Also, there are women that find out they don't care about size for intercourse, but still love the sight of big ones - those women will be pschologically drawn toward a big one, find out they don't like big better (indeed, some then fully realise they enjoy average size more), but the big guy will still have those notches in his belt his size pyschologially pulled in.

The ratio isn't 1:1 like some posting want to believe. It would be nice if it were, and that is what forms erroneous opinions, the desire for this to be a fair and equal opportunity world. On the other hand the ratio isn't 3:1 or higher, as some small and average size guys no doubt imagine it to be.

By the way, the survey shows that, overall, guys with small size have sex with just about as women as guys with average size. The ratio is 1:1. This is interesting in itself. It induces a question, why isn't the ratio also 2:1 from small to average? At first that appears puzzling. The answer is obvious though. The two factors I listed above, extra confidence, and chick magnet, make the difference in ratio from average to big become 2:1, but don't play much of a role in determining the difference between average and small, as average size guys don't often have the extra confidence (indeed, many lack confidence because of a bigger is better mindset), and average size doesn't inspire chick magnetism. So the ratio 1:1 from small to average makes sense afterall. The survey does show a slight edge -average size guys have sex slightly more often than small guys, and that is no doubt because some small guys withdraw from having sex much after being laughed at, or simply just from fear of being ridiculed.

Like I said, these are just general overall ratio averages. I knew a guy that was great looking and had sex with a different woman almost every night. He was inbetween average and small size, according to a woman that talked about it after having sex with him. So obviously it depends, varies from guy to guy. I just wanted to chime in because I drop by to visit, click on this thread, and saw people giving the thread starter inaccurate replies - telling her size makes no difference in how many women a guy sleeps with. Those replies are true from individual to individual, but in the complete picture it makes a difference. This world isn't a level playing field - when varibles are changed, many times the results will change also as a result. Nice feel good forum answers, but they just don't accurately apply to this real world we live in.

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-10-2005
Thu, 11-10-2005 - 3:20pm

Hi Keri, this is an interesting question and although I can’t comment directly on it (i.e. I don’t qualify as being much larger of smaller than normal, pretty average) I can relay an indirect experience I had, for whatever that is worth.

The person I wanted to tell you about was my next door neighbor in College. I attended a smallish school and accommodations were very difficult to get off campus so I lived in residence for my first three years. In my sophomore and junior years I managed to get a private room in the wing of an old house. There were just two rooms along this hallway, myself and my neighbor. He was a nice enough guy and well liked but he was only average in terms of looks and personality, however he was by far and away, the successful person I have ever known for the number of sexual partners he had. He had more sexual partners in a typical month than I have my entire life. Perhaps even more impressively (impressive to me at the time anyway) they seemingly would continue to come back periodically over the two year period. I can’t say for sure the reasons for his success but I state factually that he was very well endowed. As if often the case in dorms all the guys in the house shared common bathroom facilities with a common shower. It was very well known that he was extraordinarily large (at least while flaccid), so much so that it was a bit of a running joke in the house.

Perhaps even more relevantly because of the way our rooms were configured (the beds were placed directly on either side on a shared wall) I was able to hear what some girls said and how they reacted to his size. I’m still not sure how they built the building but if I was lying in my bed and someone in the other room was in bed and even whispering you would swear that they were in my room (the only reason I graduated at all was because I was a sound sleeper and used earplugs). During this time I never had a girlfriend so it’s conceivable that he didn’t realize how thin the walls were, but it was so obvious I kind of find this hard to believe. Anyway, I never stopped being amazed at the number and types of women that would visit him at night. As I mentioned this was a very small school and I was able to identify many of the girls (I know I shouldn’t have been listening and it’s a little creepy but recall that I was 19 at the time and didn’t have a girlfriend) and some of his most wild and explicit and downright 'raunchy' partners were the most demure and seemingly sweet innocent little “girls next door” on campus. Certainly nothing like any of my experiences. And I realize that many things a girl says to a guy in bed is for ‘the moment’ or to stroke his ego but I can’t believe that all of what I heard was that and there was definitely no shortage of evidence which led me to believe that a major reason he was so popular and that these girls kept coming back was his extraordinary size. I could probably go on for pages on things I heard or truly shocking situations (I still can't beleive much of it) but I am sure this would bore many people, but let me conclude by stating that penis size, at least on the really large end, significantly influenced the number of sexual partners this guy had.

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-03-2004
Thu, 11-10-2005 - 7:18pm

Ditto Kat!

My lover has not had lots of women and is of average size. However, he is the best lover I have ever had. Why? He likes to give pleasure as well as receive it. He knows how to please a woman and treat a woman. He has taken the time to find out about a woman's body and......... well, what can I say? I have reaped the benefits. He has given me pleasure unlike any other man ever has.

I have been out with very good looking men who have been well endowed. I can only speak from my own personal experience on a couple of ocassions and I am in no way generalising. All I will say is you can keep them. These are the men who are quite arrogant and also believe that size is all that matter and believe that being good looking and having a big penis is the be all and end all and think that is all that is required to satisfy a woman. I suppose they serve a purpose for those women who are size queens!

Having a big penis does not make a man a good lover. Having a small penis does not make a man a bad lover either. And vice versa. It's about the individual!

I have had both good and bad lovers and it has had nothing to do with size.

As for Blonde's posting. Bravo!!!

I am in danger of going into waffle mode, therefore, I will end this posting now.

Med x

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-05-2005
Mon, 12-12-2005 - 4:33pm

I can relate to your experience. I've lived in a couple of apartment complexes before, and it was amazing how much I heard. Many places just use 1/2" drywall held together with 2x4 wooden studs about 2 feet apart. Sometimes the space between the thin walls isn't even 4" and is held together by narrow metal studs spaced a bit closer together than 2 feet. So not only are the walls thin, then there are the vents and outlets that create sound tunnels. Also at times some couples would leave their windows open when the temperture outside was nice.

When the bed was bumping I had a female neighbor that carried on ecstatically making all kinds of loud grunting, barking,(I'm at a lack for a better word to describe it), almost unearthly deep moaning sounds and would hollor how big he was. She had very intense orgasms. Besides her holloring out how big he was at times, I had heard through the grapevine he was well endowed. It was during my party days and he was well known, and an he was an alcoholic. I also heard her having intercourse with another guy, or at least I heard the bed, as she didn't make any sounds that came through those thin walls. There was another couple in another apartment and the guy always had a big bulge in his pants and this woman would always moan deeply and loudly when they had sex. One day she started out differently, saying "youuu hurt meeee" "you hurrrrt me" over and over but even that was in a moan tone that grew deeper and more ecstatic sounding as she approached a grunting/moaning orgasm. I heard another couple and she would just go "owww" over and over but it was also in a moan tone and grew into a "owwwwwwwwwwwww" as time went by. I never could tell if she orgasmed, just the ow becoming more intense. Couples came and went over time and even I moved into another apartment complex (and eventually into a house), and I heard many a bed bumping over time. Most of the couples I didn't hear the woman, or didn't hear much from her, as some women would just make a sound as he was climaxing, or she would moan a bit as she was climaxing. This experience of apartment complex living was one of many factors in my life that convinced me size mattered to more women than is generally wanted to be believed. Like you said, I could hear more than I wished to at times, and I knew who was big and who was not. The timing of the bed bumping was in relation to his length and I would only hear women grunting that were being long stroked. The grunts would sound like extreme pleasure with perhaps a bit of pain mixed in at times.

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-05-2005
Mon, 12-12-2005 - 4:43pm
In my previous post I said "convinced me that size mattered to more women than is wanted to be believed". That was a poor choice of words. More exactly, it convinced me size makes a difference (doesnt necessarily matter to her though) during sex with more women than is wanted to be believed.
iVillage Member
Registered: 12-27-2003
Mon, 12-12-2005 - 7:48pm

<<it convinced me size makes a difference

 

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