Sexual Situation
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Sexual Situation
| Mon, 05-07-2007 - 10:08am |
My wife of 9 years wants to try anal sex in which I have never done. I am not to sure about it but willing to try it. I need some advise on the subject including how much penetration and positions ect. Do women really enjoy that act or does it hurt? Thank you for your advise.

There's lots of info on it if you do a search. Here's just one web site: http://www.askmen.com/love/vanessa/28_love_secrets.html
iVillage also has a taboo board that goes into it more than we do here.
It depends on the woman if she loves it.
Hello loverboysc, and welcome to the board.
There are a ton of nerve endings in the anus that make play there enjoyable for both sexes. While there can be pain while attempting anal intercourse, there does not have to be. Since your wife wants to try it, it will probably be easier for her to relax -- which is important to prevent pain. BTW, pain is a sign that something is wrong, so you both need to communicate a lot during this, and if there is pain -- STOP.
Some general things... Two key things to having a successful attempt is lube and relaxation. Since you can actually get a bacterial infection from feces, it is also recommended that you wear a condom. The condom also makes clean up easier. Never go from anal sex to vaginal sex until you have washed -- as you do not want to transfer the bacteria there either.
- She may wish to clean herself well beforehand. Having a BM several hours before and a shower is usually all that's necessary.
- Many women find that it is easier to relax if they have already had an orgasm. The man can be more patient if he has had a prior orgasm as well.
- Some women prefer to be on top so that she can control the penetration. Being in the spooning position also allows things to progress slowly and comfortably.
- You will need lots of lube. If you think you have used enough, use a bit more to be sure. If using a condom, you need a water based lube.
- Do not use numbing agents! Pain is a sign that something is wrong -- so she needs to feel what is going on.
- She needs to be relaxed. Her natural instinct will make her want to clench her muscles, so you will have to enter slowly and wait for her to prompt you to go any further. Some people recommend that you play with anal toys and/or fingers prior to attempting anal intercourse. Using toys and/or fingers will help her adapt to having something in her anus. Others recommend that she push outward (as if to have a BM) while you are pushing inward. This will keep her muscles from clenching.
- Thrusting is possible once you are able to be fully inserted. Again, let her guide that action. It is very likely that the first couple of times you both have orgasms quickly, and may not even make it to the point of thrusting.
- Clean up is important. If you have used a condom, most of your clean up will be taken care of when you take the condom off. Otherwise, using soap and water is all that is necessary.
Here are a couple of articles that you might want to read as well:
5 Myths of Anal Sex Uncovered
http://love.ivillage.com/lnssex/sextaboos/0,,jdgc,00.html
Adventurous Intimacy: 6 Do's and Don'ts of Anal Sex
http://love.ivillage.com/lnssex/sextaboos/0,,b31g,00.html
I want to try anal sex
http://magazines.ivillage.com/cosmopolitan/experts/carnal/qas/0,,638358_602026,00.html
Second Opinions: Anal Sex
What you should know
http://health.ivillage.com/sexualhealth/0,,7558qs10,00.html
my partner in the siggy exchange
Tish,
Thank you for your advise on this. Is it ok to ejaculate inside or not? Do you get a lot of pleasure with anal sex?
Dh usually does ejaculate inside, sometimes he'll pull out and cum on my butt or back.
If you are going to fast or to deep she will let you know. But most of all,Relax!
my partner in the siggy exchange