Slut in the bedroom??

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-10-2004
Slut in the bedroom??
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Tue, 06-15-2004 - 3:10pm
A man on another post said that all men want a slut in the bedroom. I've always heard this growing up too. Isn't a slut a woman who is dirty and services men? The dictionary definition is:

A woman considered sexually promiscuous.

A woman prostitute.

A slovenly woman; a slattern

All negative, IMO.

I love and enjoy sex to it's fullest potential. Considering the fact that this is the twenty-first century, I think that it's about over due that we come up with a better associated word other than "slut" for a women who enjoys sex(particularly sex within a monogomous relationship). It's very offensive that women who enjoy sex are compared with a person who has little or no self-respect and who is most likely not respected by the men she's having sex with.

Additionally, not all women have to act like sluts(servicing men). I believe that a woman can be extremely sexy and sexual just by being themselves. Which may be the furthest thing from being slutty. It may be she has a sweet, natural, demeaner.






Edited 6/15/2004 4:19 pm ET ET by franciesfancy

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iVillage Member
Registered: 05-14-2004
Tue, 06-15-2004 - 3:57pm
LOL, isn't that the truth. It's a catch 22, either you love sex and you're a slut because you never say no or you're frigid because you do say no once in a while.
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iVillage Member
Registered: 06-10-2004
Tue, 06-15-2004 - 4:00pm
Oh and a man who is inhibited in bed is considered "reserved" not "frigid."

I understand that society's light use of the word has made it non-offensive, and I didn't mean to come off as stuck-up about it...I just think it would be nice to define a sexually uninhibited woman, with something classier. Get my drift?




Edited 6/15/2004 4:05 pm ET ET by franciesfancy

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-14-2004
Tue, 06-15-2004 - 4:06pm
Heard it loud and clear over here! LOL
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Avatar for katmandoo2001
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Tue, 06-15-2004 - 4:07pm
My DH loves that I'm open and uninhibited in the bedroom but he'd never call me a slut. He loves me and knows that I'm faithful. I've never heard him refer to any woman that way either.

I agree that our language tends to forgive male promiscuity and punishes women. We need to change that but it starts with US!


Edited 6/15/2004 6:55 pm ET ET by katmandoo2001

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-18-2004
Tue, 06-15-2004 - 4:12pm
I don't really care about that term, or whore either. I will even say something to DH about me acting slutty ;o) It has been used for play, but never to hurt me. I think it is moret he intended use than the word itself that would bother me. And I like my DH to be a slut in the bedroom as well.

Leticia

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-08-2004
Tue, 06-15-2004 - 4:38pm
I'm new here. Howdy. :)

I believe that jeephead was referring to his wife in a loving way, he obviously admires her freedom of sexual expression, openness, being uninhibited with him (positive and pc terms) and he "playfully" refers to her as his little slut. This is normal fun for lots of couples...including the woman!

It's this way for my hubby and me. In real life, I'm very professional all day long, dress like a lady, go to church on Sundays, I'm a wonderful mother, etc. etc. Between he and I, lovingly and between just the two of us, it's great to let my hair down and let my "inner slut" come out. It's all in good fun, it's healthy, and no harm or insult is meant by it...between two people who get that and enjoy that. :) It's very intimate to be able to share this "other side" with your loved one. Many people are multi-faceted and being allowed to be a "slut" when you want to be can be very freeing.

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-13-2004
Tue, 06-15-2004 - 4:42pm
Hi Jeep. Yes and I think that's a great way to be in a relationship or marriage. Be a lady in the social circle and a whore in the bedroom. I thought R and I had that down for awhile there, but he let it slip into both areas. Working on that though! ;)

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-18-2004
Tue, 06-15-2004 - 4:42pm
Not sure if you are responding to me or the OP. I pretty much said what you did.

Leticia

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-13-2004
Tue, 06-15-2004 - 4:43pm
I don't know anyone's boyfriend or hubby that calls them a slut or whore. They just want them to ACT like that in the bedroom.
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-18-2003
Tue, 06-15-2004 - 4:45pm
Like any word it depends on the context in which it is used. I am in my second marriage and was extremely reserved when I first started dating my current husband due to many factors. Over time I have really opened a we both enjoy a little "dirty" talk during sex. I have to admit I really enjoy it when he calls me a slut during sex. On the other hand if I overhead him talking to a friend and he called me a slut, I would probably be really hurt.

My opinion is that men do want a "slut" in the bedroom

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