Slut in the bedroom??

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-10-2004
Slut in the bedroom??
142
Tue, 06-15-2004 - 3:10pm
A man on another post said that all men want a slut in the bedroom. I've always heard this growing up too. Isn't a slut a woman who is dirty and services men? The dictionary definition is:

A woman considered sexually promiscuous.

A woman prostitute.

A slovenly woman; a slattern

All negative, IMO.

I love and enjoy sex to it's fullest potential. Considering the fact that this is the twenty-first century, I think that it's about over due that we come up with a better associated word other than "slut" for a women who enjoys sex(particularly sex within a monogomous relationship). It's very offensive that women who enjoy sex are compared with a person who has little or no self-respect and who is most likely not respected by the men she's having sex with.

Additionally, not all women have to act like sluts(servicing men). I believe that a woman can be extremely sexy and sexual just by being themselves. Which may be the furthest thing from being slutty. It may be she has a sweet, natural, demeaner.






Edited 6/15/2004 4:19 pm ET ET by franciesfancy

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iVillage Member
Registered: 04-18-2003
Tue, 06-22-2004 - 5:16pm
I guess I am partly to blame for this, had mentioned that I like when my husband calls me a "slut" during sex. I grew up being taught sex was bad or dirty. I had a bad marriage when I was younger and sex was a big part of it. My first husband ending up having an affair. I had a child an did not date for years and may have gone 10 years at one point without having sex. When I did date the guys always wanted to go to bed after a date or two. I eventually found a great man who took his time and got to know me, eventually we began have sex. It took a long time but I finally opened up and we have an amazing sex life, which includes a little dirty talk. When he calls me a slut it actually makes me feel good for overcoming all of my past problems. I am not suggestion every woman needs to be called a slut. I like it and I want to be his slut!
iVillage Member
Registered: 01-08-2003
Tue, 06-22-2004 - 6:59pm
Our backgrounds always influence how we perceive certain words and acts. You like it when you are called a slut by your husband because it represents your newfound sense of sexual freedom. Due to your history, you cherish your sexual freedom and therefore the word slut has a positive connotation for you. For others the word slut has a negative connotation. When I was growing up the word slut was only used to describe women who have indiscriminate sex. I haven't ever associated it with a more positive connotation. Although being called horny, greedy for sex, sex maniac, naughty or nasty doesn't trigger any negative feelings for me. I have heard the expression lady in public and whore in the bedroom. The word whore doesn't trigger negative thoughts in me as much as slut. It is all in our backgrounds and in our figurative connotations. One man's slut is another man's sex goddess. As a couple we use the terms that excite both parties. I might even learn to associate slut as a positive label if I saw that using the term excited my husband. I think most would agree, being uninhibited in bed is generally preferable to being inhibited in bed, no matter what the label for being uninhibited might be.

Robin

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