Stretched out?

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-09-2005
Stretched out?
63
Sat, 07-09-2005 - 8:01pm
Last March, my boyfriend of 3 years and I broke up. We had regular sex for the entire time we dated, and he had a large penis. Now I'm seeing someone new, and he is considerably smaller. This is no problem to me, but he didn't come when we had sex. Could it be that I'm "stretched out" from my previous, well-endowed boyfriend and it isn't tight enough for my new guy??? Or since it was a first time, maybe it was a nerves thing??? i'm worried!

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iVillage Member
Registered: 12-24-2003
In reply to: kachstre
Tue, 07-12-2005 - 9:36am

Before I posed my hypothesis/question back on msg. 4, I was pretty comfortable with the fact that women do not stretch out. Now with these answers that don't directly address my points I'm starting to believe more and more that, although the "damage" is impossible, there really are factors we're being kept in the dark about.

My points are about levels of relaxation, everyone else's is about damage. I want a woman to disagree with my main point:

1) If she's got little to no experience and she's faced with a huge dick = nervous = tight

2) If she's got experience and she's faced with with a huge dick = relaxed = snug

3) If she's got experience and she's faced with a small dick = relaxed = snug

4) If she's got no experience and she's faced with a small dick = nervous = tight

Obviously, there are degrees to that too.

Now raindancer has another point which also says there are other factors:

1) Turned on = engorged with blood = tight

2) Not so turned on = not so puffed with blood = not so tight

This is news to me and I'd like some verification.

In my original scenario, JoeAverage will be feeling two different levels of tightness from the twins. Yes??

John, I'm glad I'm not the only one confused. You do bring up yet another good point:

>>Specifically, many women said that a large penis gives them a more intense feeling during intercourse because of the stretched and filled feeling, and also more friction than an average guy.<<

Every action has an equal and oppositte reaction. You feel it, I feel it... And it isn't true??




Edited 7/12/2005 9:45 am ET ET by muttley44
iVillage Member
Registered: 12-27-2003
In reply to: kachstre
Tue, 07-12-2005 - 10:10am

Exactly...the bottom line of my ponderings is this:


If any vagina could adapt to the size of a man's penis, then all women on the face of the Earth would answer a resounding NO to the question of "Does Size Matter?".

 

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-26-2004
In reply to: kachstre
Tue, 07-12-2005 - 11:23am

"Now raindancer has another point which also says there are other factors:

1) Turned on = engorged with blood = tight

2) Not so turned on = not so puffed with blood = not so tight

This is news to me and I'd like some verification."

What do you want verification of, that the vascular layer underneath the vaginal walls become engorged during arousal or that it makes a woman tighter?

If it'w whether or not women become engorged during arousal....
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http://www.studentbmj.com/back_issues/0100/papers/1596.html

"Contemporary scientific knowledge about internal genital changes during female sexual arousal relates mainly to the vagina (thickening of the vaginal wall due to vasodilation, lubrication, widening of the vaginal cavity), the urethra (possible engorgement of the vascular tissue of the urethra), and the uterus (upwards movement of the uterus=tenting effect+change in position of the uterus+change in size of the uterus). Recent research on the anatomical relation between urethra and clitoris showed that the perineal urethra is embedded in the anterior vaginal wall and is surrounded by erectile tissue in all directions except posteriorly where it relates to the vaginal wall.10 The bulbs of the vestibule directly relate to the other clitoral components and the urethra. Details of the vaginal wall, the urethra, and the bulbs of the vestibule were unfortunately beyond the resolution of our current equipment. However, we were able to see displacement of the uterus (upwards) and lengthening of the anterior vaginal wall and hardly any change in the position of the uterus during sexual arousal, unless it was caused by intromission of the penis."
____________________________________________________________________

You can look at the pics(fig. 4) on the site I posted to see how engorgement would cause resistance behind the vaginal walls.

"Every action has an equal and oppositte reaction. You feel it, I feel it... And it isn't true??"

All that I was saying is the vagina will snugly adjust to the smaller or average man as well as the larger man....and that no matter the size she will return back to normal, not stay stretched out.

>>Specifically, many women said that a large penis gives them a more intense feeling during intercourse because of the stretched and filled feeling, and also more friction than an average guy.<<

But we were talking about why a woman might feel loose to a man, not how intercourse feels to different women. I personally believe the the arousal/engorgement is what determines the feel of intercourse not the vagina by itself(because it's elastic).

Maybe some small or average guys can tell us how the vagina feels to them. Shed some light for us guys. Does it feel tight or loose to you?




Edited 7/12/2005 11:36 am ET ET by rain_dancer_iam
Imagination is more important than knowledge." (Albert Einstein )
iVillage Member
Registered: 11-26-2004
In reply to: kachstre
Tue, 07-12-2005 - 11:55am

Edited....

"Therefore, using deductive thinking, I would have to come to the conclusion that a woman's vagina DOESN'T always adapt to the size of a man."

One does not negate the other. A woman who wants to be stretched FURTHER(or seeks more resistance) has nothing to do with whether or not the woman adjusts snugly to the size that's inserted. And if that were true, then there'd be a lot of small men out there complaining that intercourse doesn't feel good to them. I just don't hear it. I hear they worry more about what she's feeling, but no complaints on their end.




Edited 7/12/2005 1:00 pm ET ET by rain_dancer_iam
Imagination is more important than knowledge." (Albert Einstein )
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-04-2005
In reply to: kachstre
Tue, 07-12-2005 - 5:57pm
rain dancer asked me to respond to this one - so here I go. As a guy with smaller equipment myself I have had alot of lady lovers who had dated guys WAY bigger than I before we started dating. Were they too stretched out for me? No, not at all. Snug and warm and wet inside - just like a good vagina should feel. And even after my wife had a baby we were still able to fit just fine after a few months and after she was healed up from the tearing involved. I think it was because he was nervous with you for the first time. Also I don't climax every time I make love either, although it's probably good etiquitte to do so the first time so folks don't worry. I must say kachstre that it is refreshing to hear you say that his "considerably smaller" size is "no problem" for you. I've sure found that to be true for most of the women I dated after they'd been dating "Mr Big". But alot of small guys fear they would be turned down because of this. Anyway, not to worry kachstre - you folks will do fine next time and the next and the......
Avatar for katmandoo2001
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
In reply to: kachstre
Tue, 07-12-2005 - 6:11pm
Does every vagina feel the same to you?
Avatar for katmandoo2001
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
In reply to: kachstre
Tue, 07-12-2005 - 6:16pm
They also seem to forget the lubrication factor. Women who produce a lot of natural lubrication may feel larger internally simply because there is less resistance and friction with penetration. Some women do not produce enough or as much and there will be more resistance and friction giving the sensation of being smaller and tighter.
iVillage Member
Registered: 05-27-2005
In reply to: kachstre
Tue, 07-12-2005 - 8:08pm
When I married my wife 25+ years ago, I couldn't hardly get it in her. We didn't have children for over five years and it was still very tight when trying to enter her. After child one she was much easier to enter, like no problem at all. After child two she was very very much bigger in that area. I could fit my hand in if I had wanted to. I don't want to argue with anyone but how do you explain the expansion project? Just wondering!
iVillage Member
Registered: 12-24-2003
In reply to: kachstre
Tue, 07-12-2005 - 8:28pm

>>What do you want verification of, that the vascular layer underneath the vaginal walls become engorged during arousal or that it makes a woman tighter? <<

Sorry for the misunderstanding, raindancer. What I need is agreement or disagreement about the hypothesis or point I am trying to make: different stimulii can produce different levels of tightness from the same woman.

katmandoo said..

>>Some women do not produce enough or as much and there will be more resistance and friction giving the sensation of being smaller and tighter.<<

So, a woman can feel different (looser/tighter, wetter/drier, etc.) based on a lot of factors, no? If JoeAverage is pretty much getting a mercy-lay from one of the sisters (thereby causing little lube, making it tighter, -or- less vasodilation, making it looser, -or- less nerves , making it looser, etc.) the snugness of said vagina can and will be different from the twin sister who could be totally into Joe.

I hate to use kachstre as an example as if she wasn't here, but here goes. If this "smaller" guy doesn't turn her on as much as her previous boyfriend did (for whatever reason), isn't it possible that she could really not be as "tight-feeling" as she was with her ex?? For that matter if this guy is turning her on a lot more than her ex, couldn't some of these factors also make her feel looser as well?

This, more and more, is what I'm hearing in a roundabout fashion, but for some reason, is never being addressed directly.

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-24-2003
In reply to: kachstre
Tue, 07-12-2005 - 8:44pm

Thank you mrdrew!!

Well, ladies?

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