Is this a stupid Question?

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-10-2006
Is this a stupid Question?
13
Mon, 07-10-2006 - 3:50pm

I haven't done much messing around, so I have a question. I was making out with this guy, and he was fingering me alot. At one point, he got up to go to the bathroom, and when he came out, he started back up again. His fingers seemed dry, so I don't think he had any of his fluids on him. I don't have anything to worry about right?

But say he did have a little semen or precum remaining on his fingers. If he started to touch me, is it a possibility that I could get pregnant from that? My friend said no, since there is no penetration.

Thanks.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 07-26-2005
Mon, 07-10-2006 - 4:28pm

Your friend is WRONG WRONG WRONG!!!! Virgins have gotten pregnant in the same way you described. Let's hope he has decent bathroom hygiene, and he washed his hands after using the toilet. The chance that you are ovulatiing right now is unlikely, too. It takes two things, sperm and ovulation, at the same time.

The chances are slim to none that you could get pregnant the way this happened, but it does NOT take penetration to get pregnant. If he gets NEAR your vagina with a dripping penis, it could easily happen. The same thing if his ejaculate is on his hands. Every drop of ejaculate contains thousands of sperm, and if they get anywhere near your vagina, they will get IN it, and that's how you get pregnant. It only takes ONE!

Avatar for sugarbeat
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Mon, 07-10-2006 - 4:37pm

very unlikely to impossible. his finger was dry, so there wouldn't be any living sperm on it. they need a moist environment to survive. further, if he didn't penetrate you with his finger, even if there was semen on it it would be extremely unlikely that you would get pregnant. if he did penetrate you with his finger and it had some semen on it, there would be a slight chance of pregnancy.

it doesn't sound like you have anything to worry about. but if you are starting to get sexually active you should start thinking of what birth control you plan to use.

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-10-2006
Mon, 07-10-2006 - 5:01pm

He did get a little deep when he was touching me. He did touch my arms, legs, etc first before fingering me, and his fingers seemed dry. He was not spurting any precum or anything at the time. I just had my period like a week before that happened, so I should be ok, right?

Thanks.

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-10-2006
Mon, 07-10-2006 - 5:05pm
Thanks. I haven't had much experience, and I was trying to be cautious. I was even thinking of taking one of those pills the day after, but didn't want to react to side effects. i talked to my sister, and she said I shouldn't take one. She told me about a time where a guy was dripping precum all over, then fingered her, but she didn't take any pill. She had talked to Planned Parenthood, and they told her she would be fine. Luckily, she didn't get pregnant, but her situation seemed much more high risk than mine
Avatar for katmandoo2001
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Mon, 07-10-2006 - 5:46pm
The goal should be that you don't have to wonder and worry each time you're with him. Always play safe & protect yourself by having him wear a condom to keep his pre-ejaculate & semen away from your vagina and this anxiety will be a distant memory. That would mean that as soon as he is fully erect, slap a condom on him.
Avatar for sugarbeat
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Mon, 07-10-2006 - 9:06pm

i think you are overstressing on this issue. but maybe that is a good thing, better safe than sorry as they say. but really you should be fine.

i wouldn't take the day after pill unless a condom broke and he actually came inside me. i've taken it a few times and the side effects were a bit worse than i expected.

please note that although chances are slimmer of getting pregnant if it is close to your period, it can happen. my ex got his girlfriend pregnant because they had sex while she was on her period.

i'm glad you are thinking about all this though. you may want to talk about your concern with him so that you can avoid situations that cause this type of stress.

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-01-2005
Tue, 07-11-2006 - 2:54am

Here's what bothered me about this post: Your sister's individual choice about using or not using birth control should have NO bearing on what you do with YOUR body. Get educated on birth control (hormonal and non-hormonal) before you make a final decision on what you are going to do. But just because your sister doesnt use it, doesnt mean you shouldnt either. High risk or not, you still put yourself in a delicate situation that can escalate into something more. And pretty soon, you'll reach the point of penetration and NOT be prepared. Dont do that...get educated.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 01-16-2005
Tue, 07-11-2006 - 3:22am
Statiscally you have a better chance of being hit by lightinging while eating an ice cream conce than getting pregrant in that type of situation. Granted it only takes on sperm cell to make you pregnant. However it takes several million to make it probable and pre-cum does not have many sperm cells. Not to mention the added distance they would have to travel and then make the correct choice about making the correct turn. Most would die and would not suvive the acid nature of the vagina. The role of pre-cum is to neutralize the vagaina so that the 40,000,000 critters or so have a fighting chance. Without it, they have almost none.
Avatar for sugarbeat
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Tue, 07-11-2006 - 12:25pm

Granted, it is unlikely that precum played a role here. However, the potential for pregnancy through precum should not be underestimated. The pull-out method is highly unreliable and there conception is the result of precum. My cousin got pregnant this way.

The fact is once you get sexually active there is a risk of pregnancy. Even if you are safe. No method is 100% fail-proof. My brother was born because my mother got pregnant while taking the pill!

I highly recommend the use of condoms for young sexually active people because unlike other forms of BC they protect from STDs. Although people should talk about STDs they often fail to do so or even when they do are unaware that they have them. In addition, even if you are in a long term relationship with someone who is 'clean', once you start going 'bareback' (i.e. not using condoms) it is harder to go back and start using them again because the sensation is a bit better without them.

There is no need to over-stress, just own the responsibility of getting sexually active. This includes evaluating the risk, taking precaution, and thinking through what you would do if you did find out you were pregnant.

By the way, I have a feeling your stress is not totally connected to the possibility of getting pregnant, but to becoming sexual. There are a lot of feelings that go along with it, including excitement and nervousness, so you may just be feeling all that and channeling it into this particular issue.

Avatar for katmandoo2001
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Tue, 07-11-2006 - 1:26pm
I absolutely agree, Sugar. Don't underestimate those little swimmers.

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