teen girls don't like sex?

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Registered: 04-19-2003
teen girls don't like sex?
22
Sun, 09-12-2004 - 10:55pm

I was watching Dr Phil today, and he had a woman on who worked as a counsellor in a teen crisis centre.

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Registered: 10-18-2003
Mon, 09-13-2004 - 6:55pm
I don't see this as a problem. Even if it isn't factually accurate, I'm okay with the thought that teenage girls arent' enjoying sex. I sure don't want MY dd to enjoy sex as a teenager cause I don't want her having it as a teenager at all!


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iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Mon, 09-13-2004 - 7:22pm
Well, I do love Dr. Phil, but I don't agree with this statistic either. I don't think its a very scientific poll, I think its her thinking about her experience talking to girls. And the conclusion she draws after talking with them is that they don't like it, they are doing it for the guys. Maybe some of that is true, and maybe some of those girls have a hard time looking at this woman and saying "i love sex, I love xxx." When you're a teen and your being drilled and condemned some lady, its easier to say you don't enjoy it then boldly, proudly say you are the agressor or admit that you do like it.

I was pretty agressive as a high school, college girl. I enjoyed it, I enjoyed the way it made me feel. Right or wrong, I did get a real thrill from random hook ups with just friends or simply guys I wanted to screw.

Sara

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Registered: 04-01-2003
Mon, 09-13-2004 - 9:50pm
Let me add that I wasn't a 'troubled teen', my parents were still together and my father was very active in my life, loved me and showed me affection, and I really was a pretty well-behaved teen on the whole. I didn't need counseling, didn't have any issues. I was just a people pleaser like I still am in a way, not knowing how to say no (although I have since learned!) And I *thought* that I liked sex at the time, but it wasn't until I found out what it was really all about that I started to enjoy it. And it sure as heck wasn't at age 14 that I learned how pleasurable it could be!

We talked about this at work once, how young women used to marry at a young age and so were sexually active young, but there is a difference today. They weren't giving BJs to every guy, they weren't sexually active with a guy they were casually dating, they didn't have a baby with every guy they went out with. They met someone, married, (usually stayed married) and raised their families responsibly. Big difference from a lot of young girls today.

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-01-2003
Mon, 09-13-2004 - 9:56pm
Are we talking about 13 and 14 year olds, seeking more pleasurable sex? Do they REALLY do that, at that age????

Because I can tell you, from having spent a lot of time on the maternity ward at the hospital where I worked, that although they may be sexually active, they're still pretty shy about sex and their bodies and natural functions. Even those that are in labor are still pretty inhibited about sexuality. The nurses will back me up on this one. Many of them don't want to use a diaphragm because they 'don't wanna stick their fingers up THERE', they don't know the correct names for their reproductive parts, they're funny about a male doctor, they don't know how to properly prevent pregnancy and they're embarrassed about nudity. It's a pseudo-sophistication.

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-03-2004
Tue, 09-14-2004 - 12:01am

I don't see this as a problem. Even if it isn't factually accurate, I'm okay with the thought that teenage girls arent' enjoying sex. I sure don't want MY dd to enjoy sex as a teenager cause I don't want her having it as a teenager at all!


It is the thought that teenage girls aren't enjoying sex that keeps them from not being properly informed some times. I have a baby girl too, but as scary as it is we need to face the truth, and teach them for health

  

   who_reallyknows

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Tue, 09-14-2004 - 5:14pm

My mother was very comfortable about her sexuality, so she was open in teaching us "the birds and the bees" (going old school here!), along with the good and bad of it (i.e, how good it felt, getting pregnant at an early age,

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iVillage Member
Registered: 09-12-2004
Wed, 09-15-2004 - 1:56am
i think every girl likes sex. i lost my viginity on my 16th birthday with my boyfriend and it was soemthing we both agreed on. i think that there is more than 1% that want to try. i was the first out of all my firneds to lose it but i wouldn't change a thing but i think its better to try things cuz you want too but do it when you are younger. i think you could ask any teenage girl if they like sex and they would basiclaly lie to you just in case their parents found out.
iVillage Member
Registered: 09-14-2004
Wed, 09-15-2004 - 3:24am
meh, i started being sexually active with my then bf at 16.

sex as a teen was alright it wasnt as good as it is now that i am older.

i was never the hyped up lets just have sex to have sex type. i actually took it as a serious affair.

i mean in a teenager's mentality it was ok but now as an adult its way better with my husband.

i would rather make love than have sex anyday.

~april~

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-01-2003
Wed, 09-15-2004 - 1:28pm
I can't speak for *every* girl, but I know for me myself, I did not like sex. I'm older (much) and wiser now, and *now* that I know what good sex is, I like it veryvery much. But not every teen does because I didn't. I didn't hate it, I just can not truthfully say I liked it and couldn't get enough. Now making out, those hot hours of fondling..I could have done that for days!

Maybe I'm in the minority or maybe some girls aren't being truthful. After all, it's 'cool' to say you like sex. No one wants to admit that they don't really, especially at that age.

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-22-2004
Thu, 09-16-2004 - 10:14am
Hoooooold on there Tally...lol...I don't recall mentioning 13 or 14 year olds in specific, and I made it that I was referring to the original post ONLY, in case I missed something later in the string.

Now...if you WANT to raise that age as an issue to agree or disagree on, thats up to you. I'm not inclined to categorize that age group based upon my experiences with mentor groups for troubled youth and sexually active teens and even rape victims, NOR will I do so based upon your own experiences.

Many teens, regardless the age, simply do enjoy sex, and many simply don't but do it for the attention anyway. I will agree to that part of course, but I will NOT project my thinking into categorizing this age group or that age group as to what they like and/or . I spend my time on it, but would rather not.

No matter what you and I have experienced through our volunteer work or actual jobs involving teen sexuality, that will never "erase" the fact that there ARE teen girls here and there from ALL sexually active ages who actually DO ditch partners that aren't pleasurable enough for others that actually ARE, and they even "cheat" as well.

When it comes to them doing it just for the attention, THAT can be said about even OUR OWN age group when ya think about it, LOL, because even many sexually active teen girls out there DO enjoy masturbation anyway, so where's the "attention" factor in that???

Hope that makes a little more sense. Take care.

:)

:)

C h a r a c t e r


above all else


Mr. Para

 

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