Thought Threesome would be fun...
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| Fri, 09-17-2004 - 11:07am |
I'm new here, and I'm just looking to find some people that might have the same experience I've had.
Last night my bf and I invited a friend (F) into our bedroom. We've been together for 3 years, great communication, very healthy relationship, and this is something we've been toying with for a while now.
Last night everything was fine, I was the center of attention, and everything was fun until I (in an effort to make sure our F friend was having fun) said to my bf that penetration was ok. This was something I'd said I wouldn't be comfortable with right beforehand, but for some reason took back (?)
Well, I saw my bf inside my friend and FREAKED. I told them we had to stop, I couldn't go on, and they both seemed to understand. We parted ways and my bf comforted me telling me he's with me, he doesn't want anyone else, I have nothing to worry about, etc. But for some reason I'm still in horrible shape today :( I don't know if I'm jealous or what, but for some reason when I saw him inside her I just snapped.
Has anyone been through this? Anyone have any advice?

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We've never engaged in a threesome so can't help you from experience.
That's good advice Tish.
I know a
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martinisnsushi - the two most important food groups!
I think you might be right about the learning experience part too. I don't think I ever want to do it again - it seemed like a fun, spontaneous thing to do and that's the only reason I can think of that we did it. It seems like a very insignificant thing to risk such a great relationship over, though. We tried it once, it didn't work out, I don't think we'll try it again.
Edited 8/26/2008 6:00 pm ET by inacolada
How sad. Poor guy!!
I'm curious what emotions you felt?
Did you think your BF would compare her to you, or get attached to her? What was it about his penetration of your friend that freaked you? He was receiving pleasure from her, or she was receiving pleasure from him, or that he could complete inside her?
I'm not worried that he'll leave me for her, I know that won't happen. I guess that, after the fact, I'm worried that I'll be compared to her and she'll win out. She's a very pretty girl (the girl in our friend group that turns heads when we go out to bars) so I guess I feel a little like an ugly duckling around her anyway. Maybe that's it(?)
Just out of curiosity, how did your situation end?
I couldn't do it and I already know it, I'm just not made that way. I'm sure DH still harbors a faint hope that I will change my mind (like most guys, lol) but I won't. I can't.
I'm glad for your sake that they stopped immediately. One of our old CLs was in a similar situation but her BF and the other girl didn't stop, didn't even slow down when she finally ran out of the room. That was really hard for her. Sounds like your guy is very conscientious of your feelings which is good. Chalk it up to a learning experience, I guess.
The reason wifey and I got married was because we really wanted each other and NO ONE ELSE, obviously that means no threesomes as well. We are exclusive, and it will stay that way. I'm never going to understand the excitement of it all no matter how many times its explained to me.
NOTE: I am not "bashing" those who enjoy it. There are TONS of relationships and even marriages out there who actually do successfully enjoy it, and those relationships, even open ones, actually DO have very strong relationships as well. Its just not for me.
Only thing I got out of any explanation was that one partner was just thrilled about the other being pleased, no matter who did the pleasing. Again, I'm not here to judge it, but this is what I've heard and am STILL amazed at that kind of selflessness...WOW! LOL!!
I just happen to be in the type of relationship that involves being the only ones allowed to please . I myself am special to the point that her pleasure in this fashion will come from ONLY, and vice versa of course, so that type of mentality really makes it that much more difficult for us to accurately comprehend the other point of view on it I suppose.
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Mr. Para
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