Thought Threesome would be fun...

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-17-2004
Thought Threesome would be fun...
19
Fri, 09-17-2004 - 11:07am
Hi everyone-

I'm new here, and I'm just looking to find some people that might have the same experience I've had.

Last night my bf and I invited a friend (F) into our bedroom. We've been together for 3 years, great communication, very healthy relationship, and this is something we've been toying with for a while now.

Last night everything was fine, I was the center of attention, and everything was fun until I (in an effort to make sure our F friend was having fun) said to my bf that penetration was ok. This was something I'd said I wouldn't be comfortable with right beforehand, but for some reason took back (?)

Well, I saw my bf inside my friend and FREAKED. I told them we had to stop, I couldn't go on, and they both seemed to understand. We parted ways and my bf comforted me telling me he's with me, he doesn't want anyone else, I have nothing to worry about, etc. But for some reason I'm still in horrible shape today :( I don't know if I'm jealous or what, but for some reason when I saw him inside her I just snapped.

Has anyone been through this? Anyone have any advice?

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iVillage Member
Registered: 05-28-2003
Sat, 09-18-2004 - 2:40pm

Hello,


I haven't had the experience you had but i thought about it often.

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-08-2004
Sat, 09-18-2004 - 3:29pm
I have never done a threesome but that's EXACTLY what a friend of mine told me. Seeing her bf being sucked off by the other girl was not a problem; seeing penetrate her threw her into a wild vortex of emotions. I'm noting your post because bf has indicated that he would like to try MFF if I'm up for it ... which I -think- I would be but I'm not sure.
iVillage Member
Registered: 09-08-2004
Sat, 09-18-2004 - 3:41pm
> I guess a threesome is something for couples who are not that tight.

I strongly dislike these judgmental posts. Based on WHAT are you saying this???

I've never done a threesome, so I really can't comment on it. But I can comment on making ridiculous assumptions.

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-19-2004
Sun, 09-19-2004 - 9:44am
That makes you and your DW like me and my DH then...selfish!
iVillage Member
Registered: 07-30-2004
Sun, 09-19-2004 - 10:26am
>>> I guess a threesome is something for couples who are not that tight.

I strongly dislike these judgmental posts. Based on WHAT are you saying this???

I've never done a threesome, so I really can't comment on it. But I can comment on making ridiculous assumptions.<<

-I don't really see anything wrong with this opinion.

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-17-2004
Sun, 10-10-2004 - 10:21am
Hi Mummsie-

You know, the funny thing is that exactly what you described (that strange feeling in your stomach) is exactly what I would get before we did it. I would think about him touching someone else and would make me feel sick to my stomach.

We're having arguments about it now, I'm still feeling jealous, and a relationship that was pretty much conflict-free is now tense a lot of the time.

To anyone that's considering it and isn't sure, I wish I would have been more cautious and stuck with him just watching. I used to fantasize a lot about threesomes and now (at least for a while) it's ruined for me. I think about them now and I get that sick feeling.

Jealousy can be really toxic - be careful. I guess that's the lesson I've learned from this.

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-06-2004
Thu, 10-14-2004 - 11:30am
eww. i could imagine your feeling

i was actually considering having a 3some with my fiance but after reading your post and frieds comments i don't think i will. I got that sick feeling to my stomach thinking about him and another girl. I dont really know if its jealousy b/c im not the jealous type but at least i know i would feel sick. I had a friend who had a 3 some and she literally ran out of the room 2 throw up, their relationship ended a week later after being on an emotional rollercoaster as she calls it. I don't even want to imagine the face he would put when penetrating her i think i would freak out too. Thanks for your post i almost ruined my healthy relationship!

Hopefully you can workthrough your relationship and just sort of 4get it!.

Good luck!

Visitor (not verified)
anonymous user
Fri, 10-15-2004 - 3:47pm
To All: When two people first get together, and then become committed to each other, normally the relationship is exclusive. Im curious,..What happens to a couple that they would feel the need to cross that line and entertain and introduce a 3rd person into their bedroom? Did sex get that boring and mundane that the only solution is to have a 3 some? (or swing)? When I was single there was no problem with experimentation, but for the life of me I cant imagine what happens that would let a person let another person enjoy their mate sexually. Im not here to judge if its right or wrong, many do it. Id be curious to know if both were promiscuous before they met, and just missed the variety?
iVillage Member
Registered: 10-13-2004
Fri, 10-15-2004 - 9:37pm
>>I guess that, after the fact, I'm worried that I'll be compared to her and she'll win out. She's a very pretty girl (the girl in our friend group that turns heads when we go out to bars) so I guess I feel a little like an ugly duckling around her anyway. Maybe that's it(?) <<

That is a really odd thing to say. The thing that makes for great sex is emotional connection - the best looking person in the world can be a lousy lover. Also, one off sex can't ever compare to sex with someone that you know and love.

I have also tried group sex...and gave it up because it wasn't for me. But I can tell you this: none of the people could hold a candle to my DH. If anything, the experience left me feeling so 'empty' that it gave me a whole new appreciation for my DH and our sex life.

Please don't underestimate your husband. He'd only feel that way about her if he was as shallow as a saucer.

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