Threesomes

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2005
Threesomes
8
Sun, 03-27-2005 - 11:53pm
Ok... I made a huge mistake.. and that mistake was telling my boyfriend of 7 months that id have a threesome with him and some random girl. Its not like he asked for it or pressures me because i brought it up thinking i wanted it too.. But now just the thought of another girl looking at my man makes me see red. I know i couldnt handle it if she went to touch him or possibly even look at him.. So now .. Ive gotta tell him that i cant do it... how should i tell him without making it seem like im a tease?
iVillage Member
Registered: 05-27-2004
Sun, 03-27-2005 - 11:57pm
Tell him you changed your mind, and why.
iVillage Member
Registered: 10-18-2001
Mon, 03-28-2005 - 1:41am
Simply tell him that you've changed your mind. Tell him that it seemed like a good idea when you said it, but now that you've thought about it, about another woman touching him, that you feel terribly jealous. Because you feel jealous now even without being in a threesome and just from thinking about it, you know that it would only be worse during a threesome.
Avatar for gigi_1000
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Mon, 03-28-2005 - 2:16pm
Now that you have whetted his sexual appetite, he is probably going to be very disappointed with your change of heart. Never the less, stick to your guns. If he really enjoyed it, it could mean the end of your feelings for him. Not every couple can survive a threesome.
iVillage Member
Registered: 11-15-2003
Tue, 03-29-2005 - 8:06am

You tell him that you can't do it. You tell him it was a fun fantasy but you want it to stay that way.

Many relationships have been destroyed because one or both partners were afraid to respect their own personal boundries.

Peace.
Scott.

Avatar for katmandoo2001
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Tue, 03-29-2005 - 12:02pm
Agree. Better to disappoint or anger him in the short term than go through with something you feel is compromising your relationship.
iVillage Member
Registered: 01-16-2005
Sat, 04-02-2005 - 11:38pm

Unless you know of a single woman who is willing to join you for a threesome there is a very good chance you will be searching for a very long time and especially if you are looking for a straight single woman.

With that said it sounds as though a lot of communication that should have occurred did not. The type of discussions that need to occurr are those in regards to boundries and scenarios before beginning your search. From your posting it sounds as though you have not had these discussions and feel that if you purusue a single woman without these discussions that encounter will have drama. Drama is something that should not occurr if communication is in place.

My recommendation is to have a few discussions regarding this and see what your feelings are afterwards. If you are still feeling the same then pursuing a threesome is not worth it.

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-18-2005
Mon, 04-18-2005 - 6:49pm

Take it from a guy, we just want to pretend we're doing it with others. Here's some ideas:

Dress up like another woman, act out as if you were someone else
Watch a porn of 3 somes with him.
Have phone sex over the speaker phone with someone else
Suggest two guys for you.

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-19-2005
Tue, 04-19-2005 - 10:54am
i did the same thing to my boyfriend of 6 months. i agreed to bring home another girl BUT i knew i would get jealous so we decided she would be just for me. he can watch but no touching! after going out and finding alot of willing girls he was the one who got jealous and decided against it.