too sensitive clit

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-21-2004
too sensitive clit
6
Sat, 05-20-2006 - 11:51am
Although i can orgasm while masturbating, it never happened with one of my boyfriends, i never even got close. But with my actual boyfriend, the problem is different. When he rubs my clit, the sensation is so powerful that i can't feel anything, it's impossible to let him rub any longer because it gets too sensitive and i can't bear to be touched down there, never orgasmig though. Does any of you ever encountered the same problem and what did you do ?
iVillage Member
Registered: 01-14-2006
Sat, 05-20-2006 - 12:06pm
Has he tried using his tongue instead of his fingers?
The clitoris is a very sensitive organ that isn't designed for rough treatment, in most cases.
Oral sex is an art deserving of tender loving care.
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-23-2004
Sat, 05-20-2006 - 12:23pm

Have him change how he stimulates you.


bounxh0a-1.gif picture by dillbyrd

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-26-2005
Sat, 05-20-2006 - 1:42pm

Your clitoris is extremely sensitive......that's how it's supposed to be. Some guys will rub too enthusiastically.......or with a dry finger, and that's the results you're getting. Tell him to be more gentle, or as Tish suggested, go around it, not ON it.

He could also wet his finger with saliva, or better yet, some sexual lubricant....or best of all, use his tongue, which is naturally wet, and much softer than his finger(s).

Guys sometimes get too enthusiastic, and you just have to stop them and tell them how you want it done.

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-29-2003
Sun, 05-21-2006 - 8:45am

As the others have said, the clitoris is a VERY sensitive organ. Because men usually like to be stimulated hard and fast, they often think that this works for women, too. This is one of the hardest things for a man to learn in pleasing his partner. DW has a very sensitive clitoris and it has gotten even more sensitive over time. The others suggested that you have him use his tongue , as it is much softer and should be able to stimulate better. This certainly makes sense, but it isn't always true. DFW and I have found that my finger(s) work better. This is probably because I do not rub directly on her clitoris, but just up and down her lips without focusing just on the clitoris itself. Some kind of lubricant is essential here, as dakine pointed out. We use scented massage oil. I also slow down and use only medium pressure. Another technique I employ is to stop rubbing up and down, but press firmly against her lips and clitoral area (NOT right on the clitoris itself). Then I move my whole hand against her without rubbing. This seems to work when she is nearing orgasm as her movements at this time make it hard to continue the rubbing motions.

We do this instead of oral most of the time. I've become so attuned to her that I can adjust the pressure to just the right amount by judging her responses. In addition, she doesn't hesitate to give me verbal or physical feedback by telling me to go lighter or pressing down on my hand when she wants more stimulation. For quite a while we had had little oral because she was just too sensitive. Lately we've discovered a solution. I don't stimulate her digitally first as this makes her too sensitive. We use a little lubricant and then go directly to oral. Once I get my tongue inside her lips, I keep it as still as possible and let her move to create the right stimulation. This works quite well and she has been much more willing to do oral with this technique.

My suggestion to you is to teach your BF to touch you the way you touch yourself. You know from experience exactly what works for you and when he can learn to do it that way, I think you'll find it is MUCH more satisfying to have him do it.

taoist

Avatar for katmandoo2001
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Mon, 05-22-2006 - 4:06pm
Great suggestions, Taoist, and I agree completely! Typically, men think that harder & faster is better, but for such a small & sensitive organ with twice the nerve endings as the penis, it's NOT!


Edited 5/23/2006 12:26 pm ET by katmandoo2001
iVillage Member
Registered: 05-18-2006
Tue, 05-23-2006 - 7:13pm
Don't forget that you can also try a vibrator and put it on a low speed. I am very sensitive as well and once I am swollen or have been overly stimulated? I'm like EEK!!!!!! No more, don't touch. But with the vibe? Oh yummy, bring it on. Give it a try, there are so many out there.