Too tight?
Find a Conversation
Too tight?
| Fri, 02-23-2007 - 9:43pm |
So me and my girlfriend had sex for the first time. She was a virgin but I'm not and we were literally working at just getting myself inside of her for probably 10min. Beforehand I was using two fingers inside of her and that enough was very tight. Then when we finally got it in she said it hurt but enjoyed it. Then I decided to be a hero and switch positions and then we couldn't get it back in for the rest of the night and it was over. Very frusterating as I'm sure you could imagine haha. So naturally I'm sure she isn't exactly dying to try it again but I'm sure she will come around. What should I do?

You should try to learn about women's bodies and how they work. Sticking two fingers in a vagina is NOT going to get you anywhere. Do you know what foreplay is? Do you know what a clitoris is? Do you know that for a woman's vagina to fully relax and allow intercourse she needs to be aroused and relaxed and well lubricated, PARTICULARLY a virgin? Do you know that even if you give her lots of foreplay, she's still going to be nervous, and that nervousness will not let her relax and lubricate properly?
Do you also know how unfair it is to just force yourself into her when it's hurting her? She told you it felt good because she was afraid to tell you the truth. When you're in pain, it does NOT feel good.
You need to learn about the female body. You need to know that there is a LOT more that a woman needs than intercourse......for a man, that's the ultimate.....for a woman, it's not. You may be "experienced", but it's obvious that none of your partners have explained things to you (which, unfortunately young girls are usually afraid to do!). Check out www.the-clitoris.com to learn what a good lover has to know.
Unfortunately, your girlfriend had a lousy first experience. Now you have to make it up to her by doing it right, meaning lots of foreplay, clitoral stimulation, and have some sexual lubricant ready, because she'll need it. She's going to be scared and tense because she'll be expecting pain again. If you want to be a good lover, you need to learn about women's bodies.
I'll share a trick with you that worked for me. While I wasn't a virgin when I met my current dh, I hadn't had sex (and certainly my ex was NOWHERE near his size, LOL!) in almost 2 years.
One of the things that worked for us is that he would spend lots and lots of time with foreplay on me. In the beginning, I needed a minimum of three orgasms in order for my body to be relaxed enough to receive his size. Now, he just needs to look at me and I'm ready!
Carole