Too tight?

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-03-2007
Too tight?
5
Wed, 01-03-2007 - 1:30am

Hello everyone,

Me and my girlfriend have been together for a while now and we are thinking about sex soon. She hasn't had sex yet but I have. When she went to her gyno he told her that sex may be difficult because of how tight she is. She can't use tampons because of this as well. So basically I was just wondering how much of a problem this would be. I would imagine with foreplay and such she would loosen up to an extent but would that be enough? Thank you

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-12-2006
In reply to: bassmanarw
Wed, 01-03-2007 - 1:56am

Unless the Doctor diagnosed her with something specific, like Vaginismus, it's likely that she was simply not relaxed for her exam, which happens to many young women. It's unfortunate that he "planted that seed" in her mind, too. Now she'll be worried, and that's sure to cause problems.

Make sure you take LOTS of time for plenty of foreplay, oral and manual clitoral stimulation, and use lots of lubricant, because being scared will cause her to be dry. All you can do is try, and see what happens. If she's too tight, then stop, and just try another time. If you cause her any pain, it will be worse the next time.

Maybe she's nervous. Maybe she was brought up to think that sex is "dirty", and/or her vulva/vagina is nasty. Sometimes the mental aspects of it can cause problems, too. Be patient with her, and don't let her worry about it or get upset if it doesn't work. Assure her that in time it will work, and it should work out fine. It may take a while, but for most women, it's not a problem.

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-07-2007
In reply to: bassmanarw
Wed, 01-10-2007 - 5:48pm
I would advise her and you to start now with buying some lube and SLOWLY start stretching her vagina walls where the penis will go. VERY slowly b/c it's very sensitive. Do this often and slow with lube. Start with one finger like your pinky and work your way up. And when the sex does happen remember to be VERY gentle, slowwwww and sweet. It might be a good idea for her to be on top for the first time so she can control the penis depth etc. It will take her a few times no doubt to get you all the way in. Are you big? cause if you are it might take longer. Main thing is to just be patient and don't rush it. It's normal for it to take a long time for virgins. Just be really sweet to her etc. And do TONS of forplay as in a good hour or 2 b4 sex.
iVillage Member
Registered: 01-17-2007
In reply to: bassmanarw
Wed, 01-17-2007 - 11:39pm
I have never ever in all my life heard of a woman being "too tight" for tampons..........
iVillage Member
Registered: 01-03-2007
In reply to: bassmanarw
Thu, 01-18-2007 - 3:16am
Haha neither had I until she mentioned it to me. Apparently she can only use pads.
iVillage Member
Registered: 01-17-2007
In reply to: bassmanarw
Thu, 01-18-2007 - 1:06pm
I think what I was trying to say was, I think she was givin bad information. Sure she may very well be extremely narrow (tight) but I do not beleive ( and yes I do have medical training, I am a CNA ) that it is possible for her to be to tight for a tampon. That passage is specificaly desinged for a baby to pass through. A baby is a lot bigger then a tampon. I think she is simply young, intatct and a little afraid.