Turn On

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-27-2005
Turn On
4
Sun, 02-05-2006 - 9:11pm
My bf and i have been together almost two years. our sex life was great and i couldn't complain. over the last six months it's slowly declined. i have given oral sex no prob yet haven't recieved it in a while like months and it seems he gets off quicker and quicker it sucks i haven't had a really good orgasam in months. i want to bring it up but i dont want him to feel like crap about it. I do love him and want him to fill my needs with out making im feel like bad. help me!
iVillage Member
Registered: 10-18-2001
In reply to: dpdiva_2001
Sun, 02-05-2006 - 10:10pm
Sounds like you've fallen into a routine and probably both of you are getting a bit "lazy" and probably bored. It's easy to go for the quick orgasm and that's what is happening. You don't have to be nasty about wanting more and better sex. You can point things out diplomatically and gently with offending him. A good place to start would be to have a think about what sex used to be like and to figure out what is missing now. Then start to ask for what you want and make sure that you get it. Don't just give in. Make a point of doing or getting what you want.
iVillage Member
Registered: 07-26-2005
In reply to: dpdiva_2001
Mon, 02-06-2006 - 12:05am

I don't get it. It's ok for you to feel like crap, but you can't talk to him because you don't want HIM to feel like crap? A relationship includes two people. If one of them isn't happy, then it's not much of a relationship. If the one that's unhappy can't tell the other one about it, something is wrong. There are ways of discussing things without placing "blame". Why would YOU be bad if you asked for what you want?

It's called communication. You talk to him outside the bedroom and tell him you're feeling neglected, and you wonder why things have changed. Tell him the specifics....you're missing the foreplay, you feel like it's a race to the finish, and you're left hanging. Then ask him why this is happening, and what WE can do to change things.

If he can't deal with a discussion like that.....then there's more going on than just a change in the sex. If you don't initiate the conversation.....nothing is going to change.

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-23-2004
In reply to: dpdiva_2001
Mon, 02-06-2006 - 7:58am

Agreeing with Westie and Dakine.


bounxh0a-1.gif picture by dillbyrd

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-11-2006
In reply to: dpdiva_2001
Tue, 02-07-2006 - 4:08pm
You can't be afraid to bring it up to him. You guys have been together long enough to where sex is a very important part of your relationship, and nobody wants their sex life to decline. Your sexual needs are just as important as his. He might not even be aware of it and think that everything is great. You don't have to be mean and make him upset about it when you do but It's very important because you are unhappy about something. He loves you and will understand. If you don't want to just bring it up to him, bring something up sexually like being spontaneous, go have sex in a public place or put on a little show for him, get that sexual desire between the two of you burning again!