Weird Problem

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-25-2007
Weird Problem
2
Wed, 04-25-2007 - 10:02pm

Well here goes...

I am going out with a girl who is afraid to have an orgasm (she never has). When she reaches a certain point, she will stop me from continuing at all costs. When she is on top, she stops herself. She masturbates, but again, everytime it starts to feel "too good" she stops herself. I was suprised to learn that she never has had an orgasm since she squirts regularly and leaves puddles on her bed when we have sex.

I have talked to her about it and asked her what the deal is. She tells me that she wants to continue but something in her body just makes her stop me and she can't control it (like an involuntary reaction.) I have tried ways to get her to relax and not think about it but have been unsuccessful. I know girls with bad past experiences (rape, molestation etc...) feel guilty from pleasure and may try to avoid it but this isn't the case with my girlfriend. She genuinely wants to have one, but can't help herself from stopping.

She tells me to not let her stop me and keep going but it is hard since she gets so rigid and I don't want to hurt her. Does anyone have experience with this sort of thing? If so, how was it remedied?

Don't get me wrong, the sex is terriffic... It just bothers me that she is denying herself pleasure when there really is no legitimate reason. I figure after she has the first one, she will get used to the feeling and not stop it in the future.

My last girlfriend would orgasm everytime we had sex but didn't get anywhere near as wet and excited as my current one. This part confuses me.

Thanks in advance for the help. All suggestions are welcome.

-John

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-26-2007
In reply to: john1985
Thu, 04-26-2007 - 3:52am

I don't know how into "nasty" your girl is but I would suggest (I'm a girl by the way), play a sex game with her, try this tie her hands up and blind-fold her, (make sure she's completely naked of course) talk dirty to her, get her all hot for you then go down on her for a bit, make sure you pull her "lips" apart so her clit is completely exposed, and flick it as hard and fast as you can for as long as you can, when you need to take a break do it by fingering her, ( make sure you don't let the pleasure for her break) Lick her clit like that one more time, then use a vibrator on her until you know you handled business! then get inside her and don't stop! She'll love you for ever, especially if you're the first guy to make her cum.

Do that or 69 with her where you're both on your sides, wrap your arms around her ass so she can't go anywhere (if you're absolutely sure she won't make you go to the hospital) and just don't stop! I hope I could help you.

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-31-2007
In reply to: john1985
Thu, 04-26-2007 - 7:09am

Welcome to the board John. For a woman, so much about her orgasm is in her head, that if she is denying herself that pleasure, there is probably not a lot you can do to change that. Making sure that she is relaxed is probably the most important thing.

Is it possible that she is having an orgasm? If her body is getting rigid and she is pushing you away, perhaps she is having an orgasm and just doesn't realize it. Since you say she can't control it and it's like an involuntary action -- that could be the case. Not every orgasm is as intense. Also, you say that she is soaking the bed and squirting. That is female ejaculation. While it does not have to accompany an orgasm, it usually does coincide with one.

When she is pushing you away, does she feel too sensitive to have you continue touching her?



Photobucket - Video and Image Hosting