When is sex sex

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-13-2006
When is sex sex
16
Mon, 03-13-2006 - 10:32am

Bill says he never had sex with that woman! Teens are having anal encounters and orgies and don't consider it sex if there was no vaginal penetration. By these definitions Cyber Sex is not sex, but its called sex. I had an encounters with a woman at a game site that ended up with a hand full of cum. Some would say, that was not sex. I believe whenever one exchanges emotional, shallow as it me be, or physical feelings, that is sex.

I'd be interested in the view point of the forum.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 04-23-2004
In reply to: joey2006
Mon, 03-13-2006 - 12:31pm

I consider anything sexual to be sex.


bounxh0a-1.gif picture by dillbyrd

Avatar for katmandoo2001
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
In reply to: joey2006
Mon, 03-13-2006 - 2:45pm

I would generally agree with you.

Whatever physical act happens between two or more people that provides sexual arousal and/or orgasm for one or more of them is sex, IMO.

If the intent of an action is to arouse for the sexual gratification of another person, then it's a sexual act-be it is manually, orally, anally, vaginally, penis induced, phone sex, cyber sex, etc. however-the intent is sexual arousal and/or orgasm.

And that's why my DH and I consider phone sex with another person outside our marriage, as well as cyber sex, cheating. You are exchanging intimate details and information with another human being for the purpose of sexual gratification.




Edited 3/13/2006 5:43 pm ET by katmandoo2001
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-13-2006
In reply to: joey2006
Thu, 03-16-2006 - 7:52am

But what if it's for your own personal sexual gratification and the vehicle used for stimulation; cyber, phone, video, audio, forum, visual etc, is used as an aid with no consideration or emotional attachment to the vehicle source, do you consider that cheating?

If you get off watching porn or reading a f _ _ k book while your SO is away, is that cheating? Reviewing some of the material on this site has been extremely arousing. I'm sure many of the readers come here for that reason, the sap has to be running for most readers here. Are they cheating?

There is a fine line, one that can be complicated.

Avatar for katmandoo2001
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
In reply to: joey2006
Thu, 03-16-2006 - 10:05am

In our view, any "vehicle" that connects you with a REAL person in REAL time, for the purposes of sexual gratification, is cheating.

Fantasy is one thing, reality is another and that's not a fine line for the DH nor myself.




Edited 3/16/2006 11:40 am ET by katmandoo2001
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-13-2006
In reply to: joey2006
Thu, 03-16-2006 - 2:33pm

"In our view, any "vehicle" that connects you with a REAL person in REAL time, for the purposes of sexual gratification, is cheating.

Fantasy is one thing, reality is another and that's not a fine line for the DH nor myself"

When you put it in those terms, I agree. Thanks for your view.

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-31-2005
In reply to: joey2006
Thu, 03-16-2006 - 3:21pm
Was wondering what one would say of those who read or post on these message boards. What drives one to post or read? Sometimes the subjects are sexually inspirational. ;) Is this cheating? I know there is such a thing as mental sexual gratification. Is that cheating? Just my 2 cents.
Avatar for katmandoo2001
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
In reply to: joey2006
Thu, 03-16-2006 - 6:16pm

I can only speak for myself but I have never been sexually aroused from reading the posts here. Inspirational? Maybe. But the subjects of sex, biology & sociology have always been very interesting to me, so that's why I've posted on IVillage for about 5-6 yrs.

It's just interesting to talk about subjects that few people can bring up in polite conversation with friends or family.

And the anonymity encourages people to be open and honest about their views.

One thing's for sure, I don't come here for sexual titillation or to sexually titillate. However, I can't speak for anyone else.

It would be a little difficult to have a cybersex experience on a message board anyway, unless you enjoyed long, drawn out, truncated experiences!

I'm sure people come here for all kinds of reasons and that's their business.




Edited 3/16/2006 7:23 pm ET by katmandoo2001
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-23-2004
In reply to: joey2006
Thu, 03-16-2006 - 7:09pm

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bounxh0a-1.gif picture by dillbyrd

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-24-2005
In reply to: joey2006
Thu, 03-16-2006 - 10:13pm

Sex is sex when we're born. Let me rephrase that. It begins before birth, when a fetus begins to masturbate.


We are sex. Therefore, I think, while we're alive sex is happening continuously to some extent. We simply turn up the volume of sex when we focus on it, whether

Avatar for katmandoo2001
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
In reply to: joey2006
Sat, 03-18-2006 - 2:17pm

I would completely agree that you were engaging in sex with this man even though no vaginal penetration took place. Sex is sex.

Technically, you were a virgin when it came to intercourse, but not in the true spirit and definition of the word. Virginal means to be untouched or having no carnal or sexual knowledge.




Edited 3/18/2006 3:31 pm ET by katmandoo2001

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