Why facials, guys???

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-30-2004
Why facials, guys???
13
Wed, 05-05-2004 - 3:09pm
Why are you guys so into facials? My fairly new bf does that pretty much exclusively. He's a great lover with incredible stamina but he has this thing about pulling out and cumming all over my face and hair (then he snuggles up yummily and goes to sleep leaving me happy but rather, um, gooey lol). It's not like he's the least bit embarrassed about it and seems to think this is absolutely, utterly, 100% normal. In my experience, not so!

It is fine, it's not disrespectful, and my self-esteem is perfectly OK so I'm not stressed, but ... why? What's the frikkin' turn on, guys?!?

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iVillage Member
Registered: 11-15-2003
Wed, 05-05-2004 - 3:30pm
Dear Christy,

Why don't you ask him? People are turned on by what they're turned on by. All men don't neccessarily like to "give" facials. But, he likes it and you don't mind it...what's the problem?

Peace.

Scott.

Avatar for katmandoo2001
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Wed, 05-05-2004 - 3:35pm
I haven't got a clue but perhaps it's a throwback to when they created their first "pooh" for Mommy and insisted that everyone in the house have a look at it, too! LOL!

Frankly, I could live without the "goo" all over my face though and thankfully, my DH doesn't understand why it turns on some men either.

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-08-2004
Wed, 05-05-2004 - 4:00pm
I am not at all turned on by facials, but if he is, and you don't have issues with it, relax. He seems to enjoy it, and you don't have issues with it, so what is the harm, right??? I prefer to make it in her mouth, rather than eyes, nose, hair, bed, sheets, walls, etc. I don't have to be in her mouth to make it there. Just aim right. LOL Anyway, we all like our own things, and if our SO's have no problems with it, then we are happy men.
iVillage Member
Registered: 11-15-2003
Wed, 05-05-2004 - 4:00pm
Kat,

HA HA HA! THanks for that. :0).

Scott.

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-19-2004
Wed, 05-05-2004 - 4:49pm


My take on the whole facial issue? It's viscerally, and visuall exciting.

As a male, our first exposure to our semen was probably through masturbation. As we get to orgasm and we ejaculate, we condition ourselves to associate semen and pleasure. On your face? Well that has to be a porn thing, I don't recall any record of antiquity about facials, so it is probably a very modern thing. But, he has to feel that your face is beautiful and sexy, or he wouldn't do it.

If you don't mind it. Let him do it. Maybe even suggest areas for him to "HIT" the next time, breasts, tummy, ect. He should love the target practice. IF you get into it and share in the experience rather than just be the canvas for his painting, you might just drive this guy wild and maybe learn to enjoy it as well.


Anyways, talk to him about it. Maybe you'll learn more about what makes him tick.


Crashg1972

Avatar for tonguetease
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-28-2003
Wed, 05-05-2004 - 5:45pm
I'm a guy, and I don't get it either. But different strokes for different folks -- I'm sure there are things my girlfriend and I find exciting that other people would not.

My speculation is that the attraction to facials has something to do with the fact that it's so common in porn films, and that a lot of guys somehow assume this is the norm because they've seen it there so many times. But that's a guess.

Avatar for gigi_1000
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Thu, 05-06-2004 - 12:28am
I agree with Tonguetease, your boy friend has watched a lot of porn videos where there are a lot of facials given. He got turned on by seeing the videos and now wants that all the time. You say you are OK with it, but your calling it a freeking practice seems to indicate that you would rather he didn't do it every time. I personally have never done it to my wife. It just doesn't seem respectfil, but that is just my feelings about it. As someone else said "whatever rocks your boat". Atany rate, let him know if you would prefer that he didn't do facials every time he shoots.
iVillage Member
Registered: 10-18-2001
Thu, 05-06-2004 - 2:06am
I'm sure the porn thing has a lot to do with it, but I suspect that someone used it in a porn film because they thought that it'd be erotic (and show the money shot too).

I think that it's probably more of an acceptance and power thing wrapped around the dirty girl idea. Whether or not it is, it seems like you'd have to be comfortable with a guy to let him cum on your face, that's the acceptance part.

It's also a sex act that's considered a little taboo or naughty so that's where the 'dirty girl', "I've got a real live dirty girl that loves sex in my bed, aren't I lucky!" thing comes in.

Usually for you to cum on someone's face that adds to the thing that you are doing to them - power trip.

I've done it on occasion. I quite like it. I'm not certain that I know exactly which bit appeals to me the most. Certainly wouldn't bother with it all the time though.

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-09-2003
Sun, 05-09-2004 - 12:16pm
Hi Christy,

Here is my take from a few perspectives:

a) Guys are visual creates and he probably thinks you look really sexy covered in his come.

b) It's an acceptance thing. For guys, our ejaculate sort of symbolizes who we are and our masculinity. It's like the old swallowing debate -- many men find it erotic because it's symbolic of women accepting us. Likewise with facials -- you are accepting something of your BF that many women wouldn't accept. It may make him feel very loved!

c) Likewise, your BF I'm sure does understand that this is something not all women do -- so he may think it's kinky and we all like kinky partners!

d) Many guys like to pull out when they come so they can finish the job themselves. I do this sometimes too. I mean, you've been going at it for a long time, everything is great and you want the climax to be as powerful as possible. There are two good ways to achieve maximum climax: (1) by stroking yourself to guarantee your shaft is being stroked at the optimal speed and pressure and (2) by looking at something really stimulating (i.e. his lover's face). If he's jacking himself off onto you, he's accomplishing both of these tasks at once !


Regarding some other posters saying this has something to do with porn, I disagree. It may (I don't know), but it doesn't definitely imply that. The first facial between my wife and me was all her idea. SHe was sucking me and her jaw got sore so she was giving me a handjob -- but her face was still right in front of my penis. When I was about to come, I moved down and shot on her breasts. That's when she said in a very sexy way "You could have left it there you know?". So about a week later, similar situation, I didn't move at all and came all over her face with her pumping me shaft.

When she looked up at me with a big smile on her gooey face, I never loved her more. She looked beautiful and was clearly sending a message that she loves me and accepts me.

I do think that lovemaking is a two-way street. It's cool that you are up for these facials, but not every love making session needs to end this way if sometimes you want something cleaner -- i.e. you sucking him to completion is usually a non-messy way to end the fun. It's totally okay for you to say you don't feel like laying there in a gooey mess tonight.

I will say this: be enthusiatic when he's about to come on you and he'll love it! Talk dirty, tell him where to come -- your breasts, face, etc -- and he'll be really turned on.

Any more questions, just ask

Jeff

jcon35@yahoo.com





Edited 5/9/2004 1:50 pm ET ET by jeff47

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Mon, 05-10-2004 - 3:26pm
You know something? That IS confusing. LOL!!

However, I also don't know why so many women prefer threesomes, or why so many prefer to have fuzzy handcuffs, or why so many like blindfolds, or why so many like sex outside the home. There's so much to be confused about, but hopefully we can all continue to respect that different people simply have different tastes without ridiculing them or anything negative.

Mrs. & I have learned from other boards that these 'different tastes' may actually relate back to the primary need for "excitement" if you will. Many people out there, men AND women, find that doing something "naughty" brings a sense of excitement into sex. Again, we don't get it, don't understand it too much at all, but we're kinda the boring old fashioned couple I guess.

Others out there just have different ways of feeling sexier or more daring/dangerous/dashing/naughty or whatever differnt people feel. I'm not really concerned either way for what my wife prefers cause I'm not one to box her up into what "I" like, I'd just rather her fully enjoy whatever she wants and appreciate her for HER preferences just like you appreciate your guy's.

Other than the "naugty" theory we've read about, who knows?

A pat on your back for him being a lucky enough guy to find someone loving and supportive either way.

:)

:)

 

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