The young faces of ED :(
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The young faces of ED :(
| Fri, 12-05-2008 - 10:29am |
I am dating a 33 year old man (I am 29). We met in college and he's been interested as long as I've known him. I really like him. The problem is that his penis does not get totally hard and we haven't been able to have sex yet. It gets hard if I give him oral sex but it's not totally hard until he's about to cum. I've tried going down on him until it gets hard and then I try jumping on it but it just slips out and goes kind of limp. He initiates so I think that he wants to do it but then it just never really reaches a full erection. He plays a lot of sports and works out a lot and he takes magnesium, Mega Man vitamins, whey protein shakes and hydroxycut. He's 6'3'' and 215 lbs. I'm not sure if it's the supplements that he's taking or the exercise or something more serious. I don't want to hurt his feelings or embarass him but I need to say something and I don't know what to say. I've never experienced this before and he acts like everything is normal. I think we would both like to get serious with each other but I don't want to be a desperate housewife in five years. I think he may need cialis but is that safe to take over several years? If he needs that at 33 then he would be on for a long time. I'm used to a whole lot more than this. I don't think other girls have been as patient with him and that's probably why he hasn't been in a serious relationship at this point. Please help.

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WHOA there!
He needs to talk to his doctor about this. How do you talk to him about it?
Certainly out of the bedroom. Make it "our" problem, not his problem.
Good Luck.
I asked in my earlier post if this is a new relationship.
Yes this is a new relationship. I've known him for a really long time but we've only been dating for about a month. Yes it was the first three times. It was three seperate times each one week apart. I was shocked because he was the initiator and like I said he has been interested for about ten years. He even talks trash but there hasn't been anything to back it up yet.
I would have expected him to be embarassed but he wasn't. He acted as though this is perfectly normal and we didn't discuss it. I thought maybe it was because he had been drinking but it happens whether he has been drinking or not. How many more times should I pretend that nothing is wrong? He should have been excited every time so what is going to be different in the future? How long is
It really doesn't matter if you've known each other for 50 years.
I reckon that it's one of two things - most likely it's because it's so early in the sexual relationship. He nervous and suffering from performance anxiety, and its self fulfilling prophecy. He should get 'over it' pretty soon and before you know it, it won't be a problem. I've known a few body builders and I'm inclined to think that some of them do the body building because of ego, confidence, and body image issues which could easily lead to performance anxiety in the bedroom and thus erection problems initially. That's my totally unscientific and unprofessional opinion anyway.
Secondly, steroids. It's been mentioned already but as soon as you say "body-builder" and "erection problems" in the same sentence people are going to yell "steroids"! Especially because he's already taking so many supplements it really wouldn't surprise me to find out that he's taking some sort of steroid. As long as he's taking those, you can forget about the sex - and there is a dangerous side to steroids too so I hope that he ISN'T taking them.
i dated a guy who was 25 and at first sex was okay but after a few months he couldn't get an erection or if he did get hard it would go
Welcome to the board, Gale.
I can understand that you're frustrated, but it sounds like your sexual relationship is still very new too. It could be a case of nerves, especially considering that you have only attempted 3 times.
If it's something that continues, then you're going to have to talk to him. Also, is he doing other things to try and satisfy you? There can be a lot of satisfaction without intercourse ... perhaps the two of you should try going back to some of the basics and see if that makes a difference.
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