How can I lower my sex drive? Help

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-23-2012
How can I lower my sex drive? Help
18
Mon, 04-23-2012 - 5:35pm

My DH and I have been married for 7yrs on the 29th. We have had some issues throughout our marriage but for the most part it is wonderful. We do however have very different sex drives. I want it way more than he does.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 08-01-2006
Tue, 04-24-2012 - 8:03am

There is nothing wrong with you. Do you masturbate? If not, I would suggest that.



28999825.jpg picture by nhgal2006

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-23-2012
Tue, 04-24-2012 - 8:20am
Yes, I do and it helps some but I still feel like I want to have sex too much. I feel like it ends up being a chore for him and it makes him feel like I am not satisfied but that's not it at all! I just really enjoy it and always seem to want more. I wish I didn't want it quite as much as I do. =/ LOL
Avatar for memeu2
iVillage Member
Registered: 10-20-1999
Tue, 04-24-2012 - 8:29am
I agre with BL....there is nothing wrong with you. I will tell you i know of nothing anything to lower your drive. You could try a few things, masturbate, try to turn your thoughts away from sex when you can. Like i said...there really isn't anything! But know things can change as your life changes, stresses leaves, change jobs, move, have kids, everything infuances your life!

memeu siggy 4-08

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-03-2007
Tue, 04-24-2012 - 9:32am

Ha, it's like you and I have the same problem! MY DW is in the same boat, stressful job, a mom,

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-23-2012
Tue, 04-24-2012 - 10:36am
Thank you everyone! It is good to know that I am not the only one and there isn't anything wrong with me. LOL
Amante~We have just recently added the spark back and everything is wonderful in that area. I just have trouble not wanting it and thinking about it too much. I do have 3 children that help distract me and that I really enjoy spending time with them. I work and can get through my day great! I do occasionally think of him and want him throughout the day and then when he gets home I really want him and I know he is tired. I guess I just wish I could control it a little better so I didn't feel the urge so much.
iVillage Member
Registered: 01-03-2007
Tue, 04-24-2012 - 12:16pm

Well, like I said, the urges are fine, celebrateyour sexuality, it's when they overwhelm you that becomes an issue....now, can you rub some of that off on my DW???

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-23-2012
Tue, 04-24-2012 - 2:19pm
Thank you so much Amante. =) I really appreciate it. You all made me feel a lot better about it. Sure thing! Send her over! LOL.
iVillage Member
Registered: 08-08-2011
Wed, 04-25-2012 - 2:55am

Hi,
Others already told you, that there is nothing wrong with you, which I think is right.
But it still looks like you feel that if your desire would be a little lower, some tension in your relationship would be released.


Maybe I can give you some idea which could help.
I used to take some pills with Valeriana officinalis to calm down my stress response. I had problems with stress ressistance - litle stress had very big affect on me. And as a side effect I noticed lower sexual desire. Icannot claim, that exactly Valeriana officinalis did it, but it was at the same time and went away when I quit Valeriana.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Valerian_%28herb%29


Another idea will maybe be more usefull for your husband and maybe for you too.
Right now I'm reading a book The hormone solution by Thierry Hertoghe. He says in that book that lack of or abundance of sexual desire can be a result of hormonal imballance, which is nothing new. But he also offer some solutions from lifestyle to nutrition and supplements to counter this. He mostly cover lack of hormones and consequences in that book, so it will maybe benefit mor to your husband.


P.S.: I'm not sure if you are aware how lucky you are (despite all problems which came along) to have higher desire.
There are millions of us who would give a year of their

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-21-2008
Wed, 04-25-2012 - 8:33am

Hi and welcome!

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iVillage Member
Registered: 01-03-2007
Wed, 04-25-2012 - 9:53am

No problem, how can you not want to help that cute smile, lol.

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