New here - want to spice things up

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-25-2008
New here - want to spice things up
5
Tue, 11-25-2008 - 1:45pm

I will try to provide a quick background: I met my DH in high school, we dated for 7 years, been married for 14.

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-10-2008
Tue, 11-25-2008 - 2:59pm

First, let me congratulate you in your willingness to keep your sex life alive. Too many married couples just let that part of their marriage wither up and die.

There are a lot of things you can do to spice things up. Some are very simple like after the kids are in bed, tell your DH you will be back in a few minutes. Go back to your bedroom (alone) change into something sexy and start masturbating. I know that in my case after a few minutes I would wonder where she is and go look for her. When he walks in look at him and say, "Sorry honey, I couldn't wait." I'm sure he'll know what to do.

When was the last time you made love outside. Is there a secluded place you can go to? I love sex on the beach.

How about role playing? He can pick you up one night. You can be anything from the shy out of town girl to the hooker. Whatever you are comfortable with.

How about blindfolding and tying him up then telling him exactly what you are going to do to him.

Do any of these sound appealing?

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-27-2006
Tue, 11-25-2008 - 4:03pm

I like all the one's mentioned above.


DW and I are looking

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-07-2006
Wed, 11-26-2008 - 2:54am
Welcome to the board, keepitfresh, it sounds like you are already doing plenty to keep it spiced up. Your willingness to do so is probably the most important thing!

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CL for Sexual Health






"Life is a drama, and there's only the one performance" - Luna di Rossi





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iVillage Member
Registered: 04-07-2006
Wed, 11-26-2008 - 2:56am
Welcome to the board, needsmore44. I'm Nenu, co-cl along with Meme, thanks for joining in!

Photobucket

CL for Sexual Health






"Life is a drama, and there's only the one performance" - Luna di Rossi





Photobucket








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iVillage Member
Registered: 10-16-2005
Thu, 11-27-2008 - 9:25am
I think you are well on your way to spicing things up. Just talking about the issue can help, especially when the two of you are so open about potential options. Along with the recommendations that the others have already made, I would encourage a vacation where it's just the two of you and the sole purpose of the vacation is to reconnect.


We do this every few months by going to NYC, both of us knowing that we will have fun and one of the primary purposes of the trips is to have great sex!!!


About once / year we also splurge by going other places. One of the most amazing places for us in terms of spicing things up is by going to one of the "honeymoon" resorts in the Poconos. We get one of the rooms that have the Champagne bathtubs/jacuzzi, indoor pool, massage table, sauna, round bed, mirrors, etc.... you get the picture ;-)


This is one place that we've both opened up more sexually to each other. When we return from these trips, our relationship is always much stronger.


I hope that this may have helped.


Anne