no sex anwers questions

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-12-2005
no sex anwers questions
3
Mon, 04-11-2005 - 1:45pm
Well, we talked about our sex life, and he ultimitly decided that he was no longer interested in having sex. because he didn't have the energy to at night and that because I gained weight that there was only one position that HE was comfortable doing. And that he went without for so long,before we married-2years we both went without- he was interested anymore. And I was tired of asking him to come to bed and falling asleep-alone, I'm coming soon was his answer-yeah until 1 or 2 in the morning. yes we fight quite a bit, but that is different for each couple though. No, he won't seek counsiling he thinks we don't have a problem!!!! I can't afford it,and I know my husband well enough he'll accuse me of making him look bad. And I won't be able to tell a therapist everything, he won't let me talk about our problems to anyone. I'm not even sopposed to be doing this, he found out what I was talking about and got mad. I don't want to be a dried up prune-exuse the expression. He even teases me sexually, and still doesn't come to bed, I end up crying into the pillow, he would never even know. I have tried talking to him about our sex life problems but he insists that he doesn't have enough energy to do anything at all. but he can watch t.v. and play his computer games though!!!!!!!!!!
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-19-2003
Mon, 04-11-2005 - 4:19pm

You should check out these other boards for more help than we can give you.....


  • Ask the Relationship Saver

  • Clashing Libidos/Ask the Expert

  • Is It Meant to Be?

  • Trouble Communicating

  • Understanding the Opposite
  • memeblue

    iVillage Member
    Registered: 08-12-2004
    Mon, 04-11-2005 - 5:53pm
    I am a male and have been in the same boat.
    I told her it was either counseling or divorce.
    she chose counseling
    iVillage Member
    Registered: 07-20-2004
    Wed, 04-13-2005 - 10:34am

    Enough energy for everything else except you. I know the feeling... Try explaining to him that you see he has energy for these other things and that you want some of that energy focused toward you. Dont try to take away his TV or video games , he needs this time but he also needs to realize that you need his time too.

    You may have to focus even more positive energy toward him than you are now in order to get him to receprocate. This may be extra hard to do since your already feeling down but dont allow the downward spiral to start. If he isnt showing compassion and you dont either things wont get any better.

    Good Luck