A Question 4 Men

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-02-2005
A Question 4 Men
5
Thu, 10-06-2005 - 5:05pm

What would you do if you didn't feel like you were satisfying your wife sexually anymore? I made a stupid playful comment the other day that was taken out of context and once I explained myself, my husband revealed to me that he didn't think he was satisfying me. I assured him that he was and he SAYS he believes me but he still won't try anything. The other night I brought some lubricant and some Motion Lotion downstairs to where he was and sent the kids to bed. I said, "Guess what I have in my pockets?" and he said, "I know what you have in your pockets and I'm not ready for that yet." What am I supposed to do? I asked him was there anything I could do and he said that it's him. I want to be supportive but I'm premenstrual and that's when I'm my HORNIEST!!! What should I do?

Tisha~Marine Wife and SAHM
Marine Wife~~Hardest Job in the Corps

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-20-2004
Thu, 10-06-2005 - 5:24pm
What did you say to him?
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-08-2004
Thu, 10-06-2005 - 7:27pm

It would help if we knew what you said to him.


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iVillage Member
Registered: 02-02-2005
Fri, 10-07-2005 - 2:26am

We were playing around and I had just brought him something to drink. He was joking on me and I always say he's being mean when he does that. I said, "That's alright.(Pointing to the cup) When it kicks in, you won't treat me like this." At first, he thought I was pretending to have poisoned him. Then I told him what I really meant was that he'd drink the pretend potion and want to have sex with me. To me, it was harmless. It's not like we hadn't been having sex regularly because we had. I had noticed a few times that he stopped during sex and I could feel him go limp. He said I was dry so I bought some lubricant but it happened even after the lubricant. I guess it was something he had been feeling anyway but when I said that, I guess it made him feel even more that he wasn't satisfying me. I didn't mean anything by it. If I could take it back, I would but I guess I'd never know how he felt. What should I do? Should I let him deal with it on his own? I don't want him to feel like I'm pressuring him.

Tisha~Marine Wife and SAHM
Marine Wife~~Hardest Job in the Corps

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-08-2004
Fri, 10-07-2005 - 7:38am

He was probably already worried about loosing

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iVillage Member
Registered: 07-13-2005
Fri, 10-07-2005 - 10:09am

I wish I could help Tisha but I've never had that problem (Hmmm, maybe I'm HAPPY I can't help LOL!).


That beign said, at first glance I'm not sure that what you said necessarily has anything to do with him losing his erection. But the fact is that he is. And no, I wouldn't let him deal with it on his own. What I would do is try to keep it light, flirt with him during the day, little things like tell him you aren't wearing any underwear, kiss him on the back of the neck. Rub his penis through his pants for a few seconds then walk away. Things like that will get him excited, but not having the pressure to perform right then. From what I know, sex at an unexpected time or place tends to snap guys out of that trap they fall into when they can't get it up.


Maybe others can help more....

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