What gets you in the mood?

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-06-2012
What gets you in the mood?
4
Thu, 08-22-2013 - 3:58pm

I'm really determined to initiate sex more, our marriage needs it and my husband needs to know that I desire him.   I need work on feeling sexier and open to sex, and hope that it all falls into place.  I've been exercising, and just working on dealing with the stress in my life that has been hurting my sex drive.    So what helps to get you in the mood?  Is there anything that helps get your groove back?

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-02-2007
Sat, 12-28-2013 - 3:10am

Feeling sexier: Exericise is a great start.  Also dress yourself sexier, figure out what make you feel good about yourself and do it. 

More Open to sex: Masterbation.  From my experience, regular masterbation will drive the desire to be intimate with your spouse.

Avatar for slah54
iVillage Member
Registered: 11-04-2012
Sun, 10-20-2013 - 10:18pm

My hubby and I sext frequently during the day.  It keeps my mind focused on sex all the time. Also, I usually wear sexy underthings.  It makes me feel good.  Sometimes, I flash him as he drives away, if he is leaving first.  

Do some research to find things that you might like to try, and make suggestions.  The internet is a wonderful thing.  Also, if you have children, I don't see anything wrong with scheduling sex, and talking about what you'd like to do at that time.  Go to a hotel for an evening.  Take a new toy or sexy lingerie, or your camera and tripod.

Mostly, just keep thinking about it.  I find the more I have, the more I want.  The exercise is a great idea too. It can help relieve stress, make you feel good and look good (love those endorphins!)  One last idea, and this may sound a bit weird but it works for me.  Try touching your husband with love; try to express your love for him with your touch.  My husband needs hugs, and back rubs, and pats as I go by.  And he needs for me to initiate sex on a regular basis.  

Good luck.  Have fun!

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-16-2013
Wed, 10-16-2013 - 1:50am

To increase your sexual arousal you can use thing like this

http://embodyher.myshopify.com/collections/vibrators

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-28-2013
Wed, 08-28-2013 - 9:49am

Sometimes it can the more subtle appraoch that works for me - a blouse a little lower than usual, great make up and hair - something to get me thinking. Other times with us, it's the opposite approach - whispering in the morning what we plan to do with each other later in the night, sgaring explicit fantasies, or reading erotic fiction to each other - this one never fails! Go for something classy - Anais Nin is my favourite!