What the heck!

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-07-2005
What the heck!
5
Wed, 12-07-2005 - 12:52am
Why is it widely assumed that women climax during intercourse? I never have. After all, the clitoris is OUTSIDE the body.
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Wed, 12-07-2005 - 3:01am

Short answer? Because too many people's sexual education come from things our friends told us in high school or things we learned from movies and/or porn. Bad sources both.

But "widely assumed" depends on who you're talking about really. Most people who know anything about sex and sexual function (or have been on these boards for more than a week!) know that most women DON'T have orgasm through intercourse alone.

As a society we're kind of messed up about sex. Most of us -- male and female -- place a lot of importance on it, spend a lot of time thinking about, pursing it, etc., but we don't talk honestly about it nearly enough.

Until relatively recently, almost no one paid serious attention to female sexuality at all. People thought the only "dirty" women or prostitutes enjoyed sex just a few decades ago. People still argue about whether there's really a difference between clitoral or vaginal orgasms and frankly, the female orgasm is still a medical mystery compared to the male version.

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-08-2004
Wed, 12-07-2005 - 8:34am

Because those that assume don't know the female anatomy.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 12-06-2005
Thu, 12-08-2005 - 10:58am

I think that depends on every woman. In the case of my wife she can has an orgasm with penetration and clitorial estimulation. Sometimes she can has an orgasm only throught penetration but this is very rare.
Like I said depends on everywoman.

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-03-2005
Thu, 12-08-2005 - 1:51pm
Like Tish said in her reply, the brain plays a large part in the orgasm. The brain is actually the largest sex organ in the body. The other organs are only the messengers or the antennas. The other organs pick up the vibrations (stimulation) and send the information to the brain to be proccesed. The brain sends a return message, arousal. With additional stimulation the brain sends another message, orgasm and ejactulation. In the process the brain also releases chemicals that give us that great feeling, or high, we get from the stimulation of those sensitive areas.
But you are correct that most men do not have a clue about female sexuality or anatomy. Alot of women don't either.
For me it took roughly the first half of my married life, of almost 30 years, to figure out what I should be doing to make sure my wife was getting as much, or more, satisfaction as I did every time we make love. Part of the reason that is though, is because she has a low sex drive, is a little inhibited in bed, and not one to teach. It seems like she was OK to be satisfied occasionally as long as I was happy.
I think women should initiate more, be less inhibited and help there partners to know what makes them feel good. Especially the one I'm married to.
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iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Thu, 12-08-2005 - 5:18pm
Oh Tish, lucky you !!