Wife keeps getting sore

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-02-2004
Wife keeps getting sore
6
Mon, 04-22-2013 - 2:08pm

When my wife and I have sex, it sometimes takes a little while for me to orgasm.  It seems if I dont' orgasm within about 10 minutes, she starts getting raw and sore.  She sometimes will tell me to keep going and other times asks me to get off and will finish me with her hand.  She is over 50 and says its common with women her age.  We use massage oil but she still has this problem.  

Is this common for women over 50?  What can we do?  

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-11-2001
Wed, 08-14-2013 - 12:48pm

The other posters are correct, lube up.  My wife is 65 and very dry, so we lube up.  This keeps us moist for as long was need need.  At our age is not uncommon for us to engage in 20 to 40 min of vigorous sex before one us has an O.

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-01-2006
Tue, 08-06-2013 - 11:22am

Hey you. Good to see you.

Anyway, yeah that happens to us women as we age. She should speak with her GYN and try some lube. Also from experience, spend more time on foreplay so you don't have to take so long to get off once inside her. It's no fun being that sore and rubbed raw. Can you say OUCH



28999825.jpg picture by nhgal2006

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-14-2013
Sun, 07-14-2013 - 7:06pm

Use a water-based lubricant like Astroglide, and keep applying it as it dries out.

Avatar for vel32
iVillage Member
Registered: 12-03-2012
Tue, 04-23-2013 - 12:55pm
Has your wife spoken to her gyne? It could be low estrogen or even menopause if she hasn`t gone through that yet. If that isn`t the prodlem then I would suggest a topical lube. We prefer Always Wet. Its water based and it doesn`t dry out quickly. Also, its edible. I am in my 30`s and I have the same issue at times. Maybe she also needs more stimulation? Hope it helps and good luck!
iVillage Member
Registered: 06-14-2002
Tue, 04-23-2013 - 12:25pm

You can use a lubricant like K-Y or astroglide.  Also she should talk to her dr.  It is common as her natural estrogen starts to fall off (my wife is taking an estrogen inhibitor to hopefully prevent breast cancer again).  Her oncologist prescribed a topical estrogen cream that supposedly is not absorbed but cures the pain issues.

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-05-2010
Tue, 04-23-2013 - 2:27am

That's what K-Y Jelly is for!!! She'll stay lubricated with that.  Also, how much pleasure is she getting from the act? Give her more clitoral stimulation---less thrusting and more rubbing/grinding. Anyway, even younger women can dry out if they lose interest.

I hope all this was helpful.