dont know where to go with this...

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-20-2006
dont know where to go with this...
15
Wed, 03-22-2006 - 10:38am

Unsure where to post this... I did post on in-law message board, but without going into details, it does have some tabooish characteristics.... can anyone suggest a best place to post??? perhaps a CL?

Before marrying my current DW, I had made some "private" remarks to her (only) about both of her sisters & her(one of them a 1/2 sister) both are very attractive, but since then have become less than friendly with me.

In the past couple of years my own DW has made a couple of comments of a sexual nature about them to me (she'll tell me that shes only joking, but.... I wonder....). Any DH or DBF with a LL DW have that happen to them - I dont know about this and if she has been just toying in her mind of a couple of scenetarios or shes had some heated talks with them both before we got married.... any thoughtss???

thanks
debsman

Pages

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-19-2003
Wed, 03-22-2006 - 10:53am

Welcome to the board, debsman.

 

Avatar for cl_littlemascara
iVillage Member
Registered: 09-16-2003
Wed, 03-22-2006 - 11:07am
welcome to the board.


iVillage Member
Registered: 09-25-2003
Wed, 03-22-2006 - 11:41am
Agreed...this smacks of some sort of "test". I can't imagine a LL DW making these kinds of suggestions because she is suddenly interested in this area. However...there is always the remote possibility that she feels bad for you OR there is some bi tendencies on her part which can translate to symptoms of a LL DW. But I think these are just too remote of a chance to risk treading in this direction in any way but very lightly. Keep in mind this is a man saying it and we have a weird way to twisting things...usually to our own demise. Only the hope of hearing those 1 in a million stories out there are what keeps many myths alive in us!
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-20-2006
Wed, 03-22-2006 - 11:41am

Thanks for your input jazznpercy.... Ive had those same thoughts before....

**What exactly is your wife saying? Without a better idea, it's hard for us to give much feedback.

So far...(Shes asked me out of the blue a while back, if I liked her older sister - as I said, I told her subtly that Id like to be with all 3 of them (at that time)
-- she thought I was sick etc... however Never telling her that I had a specific preference based on attraction to which I did not...)

This morning however, she pointed at down towards her vulva and named it after her younger sister! I'd nik-named my genitals previously to knowing her(coincidentally...same first name as her sisters ex)) (I know if I talk to her about it in a serious way, she'll get upset and say shes only kidding around)

If she's hinting around that you might want to have sex with her sisters, to me, I think her self-esteem isn't so hot and she's testing you to see if you think they're more attractive than her. How do you respond when she says it?

When she mentioned her older sister I told her that shes not the same as she used to be when we were single - very bitchy ergo, not so attractive anymore: (no offense to the ladies out here.... )

It was early this morning so I didnt take the opportunity YET to respond to her about the younger sibling, but I think she might just be meaning to be calling her a c* * 2;

(without referencing sex however, shes called her a little b * & 2 # * before this)

based on what I had said in the past about them though, its difficult to read between the sentences she utters and if shes even remarking about it - I am aware women have little places they like to store secrets for future use.

Although I'm not opposed to open marriages or threesomes or moresomes, I think it's always a bad idea to get sexually involved with family members. Too many potential complications - not worth the risk for a few sexual thrills.

(As you no doubt see..Im not opposed, but as they have shown their colors lately...)

Has your wife addressed her low libido issues with her doctor? There are lots of possible physical causes, such as depression, hormone imbalance, low thyroid, diabetes, or side effect of certain meds (such as birth control pills).

She just had a hysterectomy due to some complications in her cycles that she chose to ignore and I respected her decision as it is her body to decide what to do with, I think she has low self esteem on a regular basis - she is the middle child and was "tampered with" a few years back - trying to be discreet here..)
I've also done some research on holistic herbal meds (100% pure)...something here in Canada that is quite accessible - even bought some, and we are trying it out.

sometimes I wonder if not all 3 sisters have the same thoughts....

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-20-2006
Wed, 03-22-2006 - 11:48am
there is a fantasy board I am sure you are aware of with an submission of a story about a sister/BIL - if I printed or emailed my DW a copy of that, might that cause more harm than good to our DL/LL relationship; or perhaps boost it?
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-20-2006
Wed, 03-22-2006 - 11:57am
HI Tal...
When you mentioned..."some bi tendencies on her part which can translate to symptoms of a LL DW" - Is that a suggestion that all 3 sisters may be bi or something other.. and translating .... I havent read much up on LL DW and bi sexuality,, nor was I aware of links between if any...can you enlighten? thanks.
iVillage Member
Registered: 09-25-2003
Wed, 03-22-2006 - 12:04pm
I really see a middle child/sister thing going on here. I'd venture to say that if you ever want your wife to be intimate with you...all sister talk needs to be avoided by you. I agree, it was not an affectionate naming of her genitals but a direct reference to what she thinks she is. It appears there are landmines everywhere on this one. Given the entire picture of your DW that was painted in the two posts so far...you need to totally build her up and make her the center of your universe...taking her out of the syndrom of being in the center of two sisters. Just my opinion of course.
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-20-2006
Wed, 03-22-2006 - 12:24pm

hey...

--I really see a middle child/sister thing going on here. I'd venture to say that if you ever want your wife to be intimate with you...all sister talk needs to be avoided by you.

Ive heard/seen a lot of turmoils that middle children go through, so Im sort of understanding what you mean about middle child/sister.. I have tried however, avoiding sister talk for quite sometime now, and to my knowledge she doesnt talk to them, but her grandma does! So it makes it difficult sometimes not to end up talking to her about them...

Im curious.. that you didnt mention anything more about my initial query - do you still have the opinion of possible tendencies/LL or, is that off completely off the radar?

-- I agree, it was not an affectionate naming of her genitals but a direct reference to what she thinks she is. It appears there are landmines everywhere on this one.

yeah, ive managed so far to walk gingerly, but im not certain how fair that is...?

-- Given the entire picture of your DW that was painted in the two posts so far...you need to totally build her up and make her the center of your universe...taking her out of the syndrom of being in the center of two sisters.

-- how does 1 man go about doing such there are times ill hit a minefield with no escape route or having to choose the lesser of 2 scenarious???

hmmmm ne thanks...other tidbits of info???

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-20-2006
Wed, 03-22-2006 - 12:28pm

sounds like the journey im on at the moment:

Life should NOT be a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in an attractive and well preserved body, but rather to skid in sideways, chocolate in one hand, wine in the other, body thoroughly used up, totally worn out and screaming "WOO HOO what a ride!

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-19-2003
Wed, 03-22-2006 - 12:28pm

>>>there is a fantasy board I am sure you are aware of with an submission of a story about a sister/BIL - if I printed or emailed my DW a copy of that, might that cause more harm than good to our DL/LL relationship; or perhaps boost it?<<<


Danger Will Robinson.

 

Pages