Drugs? Should we go there?

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-28-2003
Drugs? Should we go there?
74
Mon, 08-07-2006 - 6:47am

I have been surprised to see a couple of recent threads here concerning (and subtlety promoting!) the use of illegal drugs as sexual enhancers.

Remember, these are the same boards that require us to use "proper" terminology when discussing body parts and don't allow us to post links to any sites which may include "offensive" material.

Believe me, I am far from being a prude, but I can't help but wonder whether this is a good thing.

Pages

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-28-2004
Tue, 08-08-2006 - 2:13pm

Hi All -

I'd like to interject two points into the conversation.

1) I think it's very wise to talk about what the boundaries are for a topic on the board. Frequently, you all advise one another to define boundaries in taboo explorations and state that in a relationship, it is important to be clear about these lines. This is also true on the board. Yes - discussions involving illegal drug use are tricky, but I think that several members here have touched upon where that line is drawn. Sharing your experiences (without detailed information on the drug use) can be a part of the discussion. Encouraging others to experiment with drugs is not okay.

2) If you feel that someone has posted inappropriately (attacking another member, for example) then you should REPORT that thread for review and refrain from replying. Retalliating, attacking in self-defense or the defense of others, is NOT allowed and could jeopardize your membership privileges.

Additionally, if you do not want to participate in a specific discussion, please navigate OUT of that thread rather than thread-jacking. Remember that continuing to reply to a thread will keep that thread at the top of the board. Thread-jacking is both poor board etiquette and counterproductive.

If you have any questions or concerns, feel free to write relationshipscm@mail.ivillage.com

Corrine, Sr Community Moderator
iVillage Love & Sex


iVillage

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-21-2005
Tue, 08-08-2006 - 5:20pm

So it's okay to discuss drug use on these boards, but not okay to discuss discussing drug use?

Jackson raised a valid question for discussion but because he respectfully questioned whether or not a particular topic was appropriate, a few people got defensive and jumped all over the guy.

The TOS have been clarified by those who are responsible for enforcing them and the discussion of drug use is acceptable under the accepted interpretation. I have no rpoblem with that interpretation, but Jackson's interpretation of the TOS was hardly far-fetched. Nor could Jackson's question have been considered by any reasonable standard an attack upon or accusation of wrongdoing against anyone.

Anyone experienced with internet discussion boards or e-mail know just how easy it is to misinterpret written communication, inferring insult where none was intended. Before assuming malicious intent and piling on, it's generally a good idea to make sure that offense was intended in the first place.

Such thin skinned reactions make people think twice about participating on these boards and do much more to stifle discussion than a simple question respectfully put.




Edited 8/8/2006 5:25 pm ET by journeyman2005
iVillage Member
Registered: 05-24-2003
Tue, 08-08-2006 - 9:03pm

Then you must think that others are easily swayed by the words of anonymous strangers on an impersonal medium such as this. Those who might be are likely swayed by much more than this and we can't possibly be held responsible for such a weak character.

I don't have time to read through all the posts, this is as far as I got, but I must say that I came to the board for the first time in what has to be well over a week today. I *did* notice the poll Have you ever used drugs to enhance sex. But I never once thought it meant a place to come to find out how to use drugs within my sex life. Like (I suspect) most adults, I already have an idea of how drugs fit into my life, much less my sex life. If I were not inclined to use drugs, a thread like this would NOT encourage me or entice me to try them. If I were already inclined to use drugs, then I might find out some useful information that kept me safe, but other than that, it's not telling me something that I did not already believe in. Nor would any negative posts (I haven't read it, I am assuming that there's something in there by someone that they felt it was a bad idea) sway me AWAY from using drugs, if I were of a mind to use them.

My thought when I read that title? Oh, look, that's something I hadn't ever really considered....hmmmm....I wonder who among my friends had and why........

Pages