I want your opinions; or rather need.

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-09-2004
I want your opinions; or rather need.
43
Mon, 08-07-2006 - 2:52pm

One of my lovers asked me how he could access iVillage. It's a large site, so if left to his own devices he might never stumble across things that I posted. I know I don't mind him seeing what I've posted, I may even want him to see it. But for some reason I am hesitant of just straight forwardly directing him to the sites I frequent.

What do you guys think? Would you want to read all about your lover, or would you like to learn about him or her on your own gradually? Will it take the fun out of a new relationship to have all the cards laid on the table up front? Or does it get the business out of the way and make way for the fun times?

Anyone, have an opinion?

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-09-2004
Mon, 08-07-2006 - 4:59pm

I have nothing to lose.

As far as a little of each, we'll still be growing and changing (as all couples do).

Thank you!

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-25-2003
Mon, 08-07-2006 - 5:11pm

...not that I am promoting an affair, which is illegal...just discussing this conceptually of course!

ok in China that is...just gets you impeached here.




Edited 8/7/2006 5:16 pm ET by talbed
iVillage Member
Registered: 05-09-2004
Mon, 08-07-2006 - 5:24pm

You didn't promote it. I didn't put that up for discussion. You just said that leading him here was a good idea.

Now, about that impeachment. Could I get impeached from mommyhood for a couple of days. Be exiled to a spa. I'll let them starve me and throw mud and hot rocks at me.

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-23-2006
Mon, 08-07-2006 - 5:29pm

Now, about that impeachment. Could I get impeached from mommyhood for a couple of days. Be exiled to a spa. I'll let them starve me and throw mud and hot rocks at me.


(newbie raises both hands and waves them high in the sky) Oh, oh, me too, me too! I'll even let them wrap me up with that tea leaves stuff to get rid of all my toxins, or the evil parts of me.

 

 

 

 

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iVillage Member
Registered: 09-25-2003
Mon, 08-07-2006 - 5:34pm
Not ALL your evil parts I hope?!
iVillage Member
Registered: 05-09-2004
Mon, 08-07-2006 - 6:29pm

But, I'm just worried that we need a slow growing process. Is that part of the process that makes certain relationships special? One would not go out on a date and hand over their diary to the date. But this isn't about all my thoughts and feelings, my iVillage posts are very specific {{{sex}}}. It's an area that I want to be totally open and uninhibited in.

I'm going away for a couple of days, maybe I'll decide while I'm away.

Hey Joel, I'm at the opposite end of parenting. I'm going away for a couple of days to check out colleges. Save your pennies now, it's gotten expensive. So, how are the girls?

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-08-2006
Tue, 08-08-2006 - 6:07am
Hi,
I am posting because you asked for opinions, right? So do not get upset if you do not like what I am about to say! I have only read a few of your prior postings and replies and from what I have read I am getting that the person that you are involved with is female and the new person is male. Well, if this is true do you think it is fair to her that you are bisexual and hiding it from her? If you are then be yourself! Anyway, if you are involved with someone else be it another woman or a man you should consider her feelings! If you can't be honest with her then why be with her? What are you there for? She deserves a right to be happy also. Why should she be in a relationship that could be going nowhere? Hey ya never know maybe she is into bisexual guys.. in this day and age it is accepted moreso than it was in the past. Give her a choice to decide if she wants to be in the relationship!!! (If they are both males I am sorry but I was tired when I read it and I have been up for over 24 hours.. anyway I would give the same advice to a couple of the same sex also)
iVillage Member
Registered: 05-09-2004
Tue, 08-08-2006 - 7:01am

Dear Loveable 1,

They are all male. I've yet to be with another woman. Not that it matters, for as you said the advice would be the same either way.

I'm not listening to comments as to whether or not I should be dating the man. There is a lot of previous experience and thoughts posted in the past two years. I just wondered if I should expedite his finding it, or let it happen gradually.

By the way, I've decided to give him the directions to the three message boards that I visit the most frequently.

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-09-2004
Tue, 08-08-2006 - 7:05am
He's getting directed to the sites today. There is nothing that will hurt him, a few things that will shock him though. He won't mind the shock though, in fact he will probably think about it and end up excited by those things.
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-28-2003
Tue, 08-08-2006 - 7:07am

Remember the "Pina Colada" song ("Escape" by Rupert Holmes)?

One possibility is that by reading your posts he may discover that you are even more to his tastes than he realized.

On the other hand, he may find that you on occasion write things that he finds abhorrent and cannot support.

Personally, I think I would find it stifling if friends or family knew my iVillage handle. I would have to think about and/or filter every post to ensure that it doesn't lead to hurt feelings or arguments with friends/family.