Threesomes?????
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Threesomes?????
| Thu, 07-20-2006 - 4:56pm |
ok if you are one of the many people that can do a three some with your partner then please answer this for me.
Are you really in love with your partner if you can watch them have sex with some one else?
Do they really love you if they can watch you have sex with some one else?
Very Confused....

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Hi girlunsure,
I'm glad you came back to tell us how the talk went, because I've been thinking about you, and wondering.
I know, I'm not buying it either and I'm okay with that. I was hurt yesterday about his friends admission telling me that my husband has done a threesome before with another guy and a girl and he never admitted it to me. It's neither here nor there as far as today goes and the feeling of him keeping it from me will pass and eventually the truth will surface and he will wonder how I kept it in knowing the whole time and not bringing it up. Besides, he is mine now and that's what counts to me, not the high school threesome, ya I'm a little disappointed in him for not being straight with me on it and making me think it was all "new" and exciting...
Despite all that I thought today to myself that I'm okay with where I'm at with this whole idea. I know more now than I did years ago when he first brought it up, I know that things have to be discussed before ever venturing into territories unknown and I know that no matter how serious he is sounding about his take on us being "ready" for this type of experience.....actions speak louder than words and he needs to talk to me, listen to me and meet me where I feel comfortable. It all needs to be agreed upon beforehand in order to work....Bottom line.
I am so glad I have come here to discuss this with you ! I just had no idea that it was such a huge topic. I mean, like I said, I knew of things outside my life, things I heard about but I just never really had the nerve to open up to the discussion. I do have to thank my most adventurous husband for holding my hand and opening my mind up to a few new things, that's for sure.....Anyhow, you have been so great here. Thanks.
Girlunsure
Hi Maggie
Thanks so much for your words of infinite wisdom! It's so good to read your posts, so good to hear rational thoughts on the whole subject. I think you definitely hit the nail on the head when you said that his selfishness is a character issue and probably the most of the problem at this point and not even the threesome. I so agree because it adds up. I've accused him in my head of selfishness in the past in other areas and this whole thing just reaffirms my ideas in that respect. I am hurt about his not coming clean about his previous escapade in high school. Not because he did it, I could care less, more because he has been making me feel all these last years that "we" were ready for this wonderfully "new" and "exciting" adventure and that it was new for us BOTH when actually that is not the case. The MFM as opposed to what he is asking now, the FMF is different but the idea is the same. I'm sure my disappointment will pass and I'll get over it, I'm also sure that the truth of it will come out later. I feel that if his friend told me about it, he might be just as apt to spill it to my husband that he told me himself and then my husband will wonder why I did not bring it up. I'll deal with that whenever it happens. For now, I'm not budging any further on the issue. I think we have some more important things to work on and when I feel we have discussed enough of what I want to discuss until I'm comfortable with the big picture, then we can move on. Until then, I'm looking forward to a Pure Romance party on Sunday afternoon so maybe I'll have a few more new ideas to share with him when I return :-). Thank you again, this has been such an awesome place for me to get started in my venture to learn more about threesomes/swinging and just plain meeting really nice, open people to talk to....
Girlunsure
"For now, I'm not budging any further on the issue. I think we have some more important things to work on and when I feel we have discussed enough of what I want to discuss until I'm comfortable with the big picture, then we can move on."
You don't sound confused anymore, and that's great.
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