Grab a mic. It's HUMPDAY

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-24-2006
Grab a mic. It's HUMPDAY
18
Wed, 11-21-2007 - 7:37am

Tell a joke.. a humerous story...

Wake it, shake it Mony

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iVillage Member
Registered: 02-04-2007
Wed, 11-21-2007 - 8:42am

Bobbitt Family Update

In a recent news broadcast, it was announced that Lorena Bobbitt's sister Louella was arrested for an alleged attempt to perform the same act on her husband as her famous sister had done several years ago. Sources reveal the sister was not as accurate as Lorena.

She allegedly missed the target and stabbed her husband in the upper thigh causing severe muscle and tendon damage. The husband is reported to be in serious, but stable condition, and Louella has been charged with ...

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A Misdewiener!

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brcancerawrblnky.gif, breast cancer awareness blinky by Bette Campbell

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-04-2007
Wed, 11-21-2007 - 9:01am

After returning from his honeymoon in Florida with his new bride, Virginia, Luigi stopped by his old barbershop in Jersey to say hello to his friends.

Giovanni said, "HeyLuigi, how wasa da treep?"

Luigi said, "Everyting was a perfecto except for da train ride down."

“Whata you mean, Luigi?" asked Giovanni.

“Well, we boarda da train at Grana Central Station. My Virginia, she pack a biga basket a food. She broughta da vino, some nice cigars for me, and we were lookina forward to da trip and open upa da luncha basket. The conductore comea by, waga his finger at us anda say, 'no eat indisa car. Musta use a dining car.’ So, me and my beautiful Virginia, we go to a dining car, eat a biga lunch and starta ta open da bottle of a nice a vino! Conductore walka by again, waga his finger and say, 'No drinka in disa car! Musta use a cluba car.' So, we go to cluba car. While a drinkina da vino, I starta to lighta my biga cigar. The conductore, he waga his finger again and say, 'No a smokina disa car. Musta go to a smokina car.' "We go to a smokina car and I smoke a my biga cigar. Then my beautiful Virginia and I, we go to a sleeper car anda go to bed. We just about to go boombada boombada and the conductore, he walka through da hall shouting ata top of his voice. 'Nofolka Virginia! Nofolka Virginia!' Nexta time, I'ma just gonna taka da bus.

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brcancerawrblnky.gif, breast cancer awareness blinky by Bette Campbell

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-01-2006
Wed, 11-21-2007 - 9:29am

Oh, those are funny... Where do you find these...


Morning everyone...



28999825.jpg picture by nhgal2006

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-24-2006
Wed, 11-21-2007 - 10:16am

Dusty Underwear

One evening a husband, thinking he was being funny, said to his wife
"Perhaps we should start washing your clothes in Slim Fast. Maybe it
would take a few inches off of your butt!!"

His wife was not amused, and decided that she simply couldn't let such
a comment go unrewarded.

The next morning the husband took a pair of underwear out of his
drawer. "What the Hell is this??" he said to himself as a little "dust"
cloud appeared when he shook them out.

"April," he hollered into the bathroom, "Why did you put talcum powder
in my underwear?" She replied with a snicker... "It's not talcum
powder...... It's
'Miracle Grow'."

E

Wake it, shake it Mony

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-01-2006
Wed, 11-21-2007 - 10:24am

hahaha, morning E...


What are your Thanksgiving plans?



28999825.jpg picture by nhgal2006

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-09-2005
Wed, 11-21-2007 - 10:41am

THE POWER OF THE PRESS


A pastor of a church was seeking for ways to help his financially struggling church to raise money.

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-09-2005
Wed, 11-21-2007 - 11:00am

LMAO!

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-25-2006
Wed, 11-21-2007 - 11:32am

Twas the night before Thanksgiving I just couldn't sleep,


I tried counting backwards, I tried counting sheep.


The food beckoned - the dark meat and white,


but I fought the temptations with all of my might.



Tossing and turning with anticipation, the thought of a snack was infatuation.


So, I raced to the kitchen, flung open the door,


and gazed at the fridge, full of goodies galore.


I gobbled up turkey and buttered potatoes, pickles and carrots, beans and tomatoes.



I felt myself swelling so plump and so round,


til all of a sudden, I rose off the ground.


I crashed through the ceiling, floating into the sky,


with a mouthful of pudding and handful of pie.


But, I managed to yell as I soared past the trees...


Happy eating to all - pass the cranberries, please.












iVillage Member
Registered: 10-24-2006
Wed, 11-21-2007 - 11:49am

Hiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii

Wake it, shake it Mony

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-24-2006
Wed, 11-21-2007 - 11:53am
Hiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii Moon!

Wake it, shake it Mony

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