Hard questions, try to give imput

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-03-2003
Hard questions, try to give imput
78
Wed, 05-14-2008 - 5:02pm

Try if you can to answer this question or maybe just give some ideas.


Is there anything you can think of that helped you be more sexually open?


How were you able to take the fantasies from you mind and bring them into the bedroom? If not the whole fantasy maybe just parts of it?


Do you believe you SO had anything to do with you being able to be sexually open?


If you have a HL and you mate has LL how do you deal with it? If you are not having sex as often as you like do you feel your relationship suffers?


I know these are hard and yes I will answer but I just need a bit more time.

Photobucket
Photobucket 

Pages

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-04-2007
Sat, 05-17-2008 - 12:33am
Big (((((HUGS))))) Lori and strength too...chin up girl and go for what makes you truly happy...you deserve it!!!

brcancerawrblnky.gif, breast cancer awareness blinky by Bette Campbell

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-03-2003
Sat, 05-17-2008 - 12:41am
Thank you so much. It means so much to me to have the support of all the wonderful people here on the boards. It does give me extra strength and yes I will do what makes me happy :)
Photobucket
Photobucket 
iVillage Member
Registered: 05-13-2008
Sat, 05-17-2008 - 12:54am

hotallthetime .

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-28-2004
Sat, 05-17-2008 - 9:15am

"Missy do you think your hubby is trying to work with you? How many children do you have? It is hard to mesh different ways of living. By reading your post, and please dont' be offended but is your hubby involved in any type of drug use? Forgive me if I am way off base, I maybe reading too much between the lines. If he is I understand all to well about that."

dh works a little with me not much. I have one she is 12yrs. It takes alot for me to be offended.... but to answer your question, yes dh is clean of his doc. That was a big, huge thing with me. So now we are trying to figure out how to have him be a step parent and a husband in one shot......with a pre teen in the house...... dont get me wrong they get along. He is just "anal" with some of his "rules" and he does not really have to be.

Photobucket
iVillage Member
Registered: 08-03-2003
Sat, 05-17-2008 - 9:37am
I have an 8 year old girl. In our home I argue with her father many times on issues that come up. I know when a person gets off their DOC, it can be a huge transition for them to step into life sober and then try to deal with things. When they are using they are far from what is going on in real life, so for him to step into the role of husband and father can be rocky at best. Please don't think by my statement I condone drug use, I can just understand what a strain it puts on the whole family. So is your household peaceful or are you still working on that? It is hard to raise a child. We are going threw the issue of our daughter liking boys. I am more easy going because when she does start to date I want her to be able to talk to me. Hubby is so strict I think he scares her. I know there will come a day when my daughter wants to have sex, hopefully later on in life. I started having sex way to young. I want her to be able to talk to me, hopefully with my experiance I can keep her from making too many mistakes.
Photobucket
Photobucket 
iVillage Member
Registered: 01-28-2004
Sat, 05-17-2008 - 9:54am

So is your household peaceful or are you still working on that? For the most part we are peaceful......... dh has been clean for about a month now.....so we do have our days, which is expected.

"Hubby is so strict I think he scares her" Oh yes i understand that one. My dh is big, tall and kind of scary looking so he can get a temper. But when he just drives his "rules" home its hard.......

I made a whole lot of mistakes and i am trying to make sure my dd does not make them either. I am more laid back when it comes to certain things......its not worth my stress level. But i have other issues to deal with...... my dd has a step mother who is 24 that needs a play mate and chooses my dd to be that........ and with the abusive ex thats not easy either.....so we are hoping that jr high will get her away from them more.

Photobucket
iVillage Member
Registered: 08-03-2003
Sat, 05-17-2008 - 10:12am

Missy, I have to add this, many times when a person is newly getting off drugs they have to learn how to deal with life without the drug. Their mind has to heal from the drug abuse and it doesn't happen over night. I am not making excuses. Oh having a step mom that is 24 can be hard enough, I can't imagine the issues you have to deal with. So do you still have some issues with the ex hubby, does he still try to control you? I hope JR high helps you daughter.

Photobucket
Photobucket 
iVillage Member
Registered: 01-28-2004
Sat, 05-17-2008 - 11:09am
yes i know time helps and that is where we are right now. taking time. as for the ex yes he is still doing his whatever you call it. as for me my dh does help when dd is gone over there..... (long story there) so as far as jr high i am not putting all my hopes there just some.......... I know its not easy and i know it takes time. Rules are needed and expected. What my dh has learned so far as its just going to take time and throwing your hands up and leaving is not really something we all need. but an option since he still has his apt for another two months. I think it has alot of giving up that security too.
Photobucket
iVillage Member
Registered: 01-28-2004
Sat, 05-17-2008 - 11:13am
thanks Lori
Photobucket
iVillage Member
Registered: 08-01-2006
Sat, 05-17-2008 - 4:27pm
Hi missy, Just wanted to say I like the new siggy! Hope you're having a good day.

myspace-harley-davidson-comments-5.jpg picture by nhgal2006


Biker-Lady-Diva.jpg picture by nhgal2006


Close-up of a Wolf, Canis Lupus Photographic Print by Robert Franz



28999825.jpg picture by nhgal2006

Pages