mfm threesome tips

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-20-2008
mfm threesome tips
6
Thu, 05-09-2013 - 2:07pm

In two weeks, I will probably participate in an mfm threesome (I'm one of the males), because I have been invited. I have no experience, but would like to do this. Any thoughts and feedback would be more than welcome. Thank you.

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-21-2013
Fri, 06-21-2013 - 4:22pm

The threesome (AKA the menage a trois) is a very common fantasy. Three people (any combination of males or females) having sex with each other in a kind of 'mini-orgy', if you like. The big question is whether you should you act on this fantasy, or just file the idea away with a big box of tissues for a rainy day.

Why have a threesome?

The most common reason for wanting one is the idea of trying something new, and having more to look at and feel. Some people want to have twice as much attention as they normally get during sex. Others may be drawn to threesomes because it's 'forbidden', or just because of the idea of horny sex without romantic attachment.

Do you really want one?

Some people try to push reluctant boyfriends/girlfriends into threesomes that they don't really want to do. Sometimes it's a selfish power trip, and sometimes it's just an excuse for being unfaithful without getting dumped. Think very carefully about any partner who doesn't respect your feelings - do you really want to be in a relationship with someone like that? Agreeing to take part in a threesome to breathe life back into a failing relationship, or to stop your partner from leaving you, is probably going to backfire.

Threesome fall outs

Problems are most likely to arise when two of the people involved are in a long-term relationship together. You may be in for a nasty shock when insecurities ('she wants an extra partner because I'm not good enough in bed') or jealousies ('he wants her more than he wants me') blow up. You could also find out that your so-called straight partner is really gay or bisexual, but hasn't got around to telling you about it. Yet. And you could end up with one person you really fancy, plus a right minger, who you obviously don't.

Safety first

If you do decide to throw caution to the wind, don't forget about safe sex. As always, keep your wits about you and be careful if you decide to get it on with people you don't really know. Trust your instincts and don't take risks with your personal safety.

So, how do you do it?

Some people try threesomes with their friends, some people advertise for partners, and others go to swingers' clubs and parties. As for the actual sex, there's no 'right way' or running order for proceedings, so you just have to use your imagination and make it up as you go along.

Threesome trouble

We've already established it's more to do with lust than a loving relationship, so don't have any romantic expectations, and you won't be disappointed in that area. Oh, and never involve someone that you work with

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-21-2013
Fri, 06-21-2013 - 4:15pm

Discuss it with the couple you are having a three some with.  Everyone has rules and different ones according to the people involved.  There is no advice since we don't know the other two people and what they are expecting.  Are you sexual with just the woman?

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-21-2013
Fri, 06-21-2013 - 4:15pm

Discuss it with the couple you are having a three some with.  Everyone has rules and different ones according to the people involved.  There is no advice since we don't know the other two people and what they are expecting.  Are you sexual with just the woman?

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-22-2013
Wed, 05-22-2013 - 2:49pm
I was lucky and fortunate enough to have my first MMF threesome with my wife a few weeks ago - a lot of fun!!! I agree with StarStruck's advice. Take it slowly one step at a time... don't try to "force" the action - it will just backfire. It might not be a bad idea to talk with the 2 others to see how they imagine this happening and if there are any boundaries that need to be respected.
iVillage Member
Registered: 05-15-2013
Wed, 05-15-2013 - 11:12pm

I think it's cool that you're asking for advice.  Many years ago, I was "accidentally" in a threesome with two friends.  One of them had it planned the whole time, the other one was as surprised as me. Neither was a boyfriend, and the one who was also surprised was bi, we think. 

Since then, I've been in other situations but with more than 2 guys at the same time. Here's my best advice:

1. Don't be nervous if you can help it.  Everyone's there for the same reason.

2. Don't focus on just one act, like eating her or something.  Be playful and experiment.  These are obviously open-minded people and so are you.

3. Don't go to great lengths to avoid any contact with the other male.  Even if you're not bi, he probably isn't going to freak out if he's done this before.  Esp if you attempt DP, there will be some male-to-male touching.

4. Stop, of course, if anyone says stop.

5. I'd suggest that earlier that day, you "spank the monkey" so you can last longer - it's going to be fun!

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-15-2013
Wed, 05-15-2013 - 11:10pm

I think it's cool that you're asking for advice.  Many years ago, I was "accidentally" in a threesome with two friends.  One of them had it planned the whole time, the other one was as surprised as me. Neither was a boyfriend, and the one who was also surprised was bi, we think. 

Since then, I've been in other situations but with more than 2 guys at the same time. Here's my best advice:

1. Don't be nervous if you can help it.  Everyone's there for the same reason.

2. Don't focus on just one act, like giving her head or something.  Be playful and experiment.  These are obviously open-minded people and so are you.

3. Don't go to great lengths to avoid any contact with the other male.  Even if you're not bi, he probably isn't going to freak out if he's done this before.  Esp if you attempt DP, there will be some male-to-male touching.

4. Stop, of course, if anyone says stop.

5. I'd suggest that earlier that day, you "spank the monkey" so you can last longer - it's going to be fun!