Q for the gals - BAD BOYS

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-02-2006
Q for the gals - BAD BOYS
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Fri, 05-09-2008 - 7:38am
So I've got a platonic female friend that I pal around with. We dated a couple of times and have been "friends" since then. We sit and chat about things and even though she's a 31 year old mother of a 4 y.o., she STILL wants to find herself a "bad boy" - that's her type even though (from the sounds of things) they keep breaking her heart and treating her badly. What is it with the bad boys for you gals AND at what point in your life do you start passing them up for someone nice?
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iVillage Member
Registered: 04-15-2008
Fri, 05-09-2008 - 7:51am

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-01-2006
Fri, 05-09-2008 - 8:04am
Bad boys are wild, carefree,



28999825.jpg picture by nhgal2006

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-15-2008
Fri, 05-09-2008 - 8:35am
iVillage Member
Registered: 01-02-2006
Fri, 05-09-2008 - 9:18am
she hasn't missed out on any freedom in life, very much the opposite actually. and she's had her bad boys before and the stick it to her every single time.....women are so hard to figure out
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iVillage Member
Registered: 08-03-2006
Fri, 05-09-2008 - 10:37am

Ah yes...bad boys...I've had it bad for them since I discovered boys lol...I even married one. He's never treated me bad, quite the opposite. Its getting past that rough exterior that the hard part. There could be any number of reasons she wants this. You say she didn't miss out on her youth, but perhaps she still wants to hold onto it. There are plenty of women out there who continue to follow the same path they did when they were much younger, and if thats the case she probably just has yet to figure out what she really wants in a relationship. Alot of times those "bad boys" are serial bachelors, meaning they have no intentions of settling down, which is actually perfect for a woman who isn't interested in marraige or a long term relationship, they're just someone good that have fun with. If you want something lasting with one of these guys they have to open up and let you in, and it takes alot of work to get them to do that, but if you can, he's given you something very special.


My guess is that since she's already got a child, she's probably not looking for anything long term, if she was she wouldn't be looking for this particular type of guy. I hate to say "they're a project" but they really are, breaking down those walls can be frustrating and takes alot of patience on your part. With a child I magine she doesn't have time for that and just wants to have a little fun.

Lothiriel


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Death: You get what everyone gets....you get a lifetime.....

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iVillage Member
Registered: 02-17-2007
Fri, 05-09-2008 - 11:09am

When I was in college I fell for a 'bad boy' I was so head over heels it was silly. More recently I ran into him again and he's not such a bad boy anymore. I think part of my attraction back then was to the unpredictability of him. I didn't know when he was going to call, when he'd show up. With a 'nice guy' you usually know where you stand, but with a 'bad guy' you don't always know and in a sort of messed up way that's sort of fun.

I think it sort of goes back to childhood. Boys chasing the girls at recess. Passing notes, 'do you like so-n-so' It's all the anticipation and games.

Just my thoughts!

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-20-2007
Fri, 05-09-2008 - 2:45pm

I married a bad boy when I was 26. We were married for 10 years, so I was in my late 30s when I was finally able to break free of him. He was verbally, mentally, emotionally and then physically abusive towards me. He was an alcoholic and a drug addict.

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-02-2006
Fri, 05-09-2008 - 3:08pm
yeah, her ex bf from 2+ years ago (who she still has feelings for) is a drug addict that got her into a bit of debt. But she goes back to that type I guess
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iVillage Member
Registered: 06-28-2007
Fri, 05-09-2008 - 3:12pm

Hey Jeff:


Can't speak for all women, but bad boys have something thats undescribable.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 11-10-2007
Fri, 05-09-2008 - 3:33pm

There are bad boys and then there are bad boys.

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