Queston about steping out on mate

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Registered: 08-03-2003
Queston about steping out on mate
126
Sat, 05-31-2008 - 12:48pm

For those of you have had an affair or would consider an affair this question is for you, Do you think you could have an affair that was just sexual with no emotions envolved?


If you had a person that you had sex with on a regular basis do you think you would develop an emotionl attachment?


Also if you ever did consider doing this would that mean that the love you once had for you mate had either gone away or was almost gone?


I believe for most women they try to have affairs but at some point emotions get involved. If they are married most would tell you they are no longer in love with their husbands.

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Registered: 08-01-2006
Tue, 06-03-2008 - 7:45am

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Registered: 08-01-2006
Tue, 06-03-2008 - 7:48am
Hi and welcome njmx. It's nice to meet you. Stick around, there are some great people here, and we have fun! Hey, will you do me a favor? Please fill in your profile so we can know something about you. Thanks!

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Registered: 05-31-2008
Tue, 06-03-2008 - 8:14am
It is true what 'noexcusess' says. You can be 'in love' with 2 people at one time. My situation is quite rare though.
I've been married for 7 years...and would never have thought I would venture down the 'affair road'. My affair however isn't with a co-worker or some guy I met, or even a family friend. He's my child's biological father, so we have a history going back some 12 years. Long story short, he was imature and selfish, we were young( I-17, AP-21). He made choices, and I moved on. 3 years later I married the man, that I couldn't live without, and still can't. So then why last year, when the AP (not at that time yet) asked me if I was happy, did I really start contemplating my happiness, life and marriage? I did though...we met up and we talked... I never stopped loving him, I just pushed what I felt aside, so I could move on with my life.
Turns out, the passion is still there...the first time we kissed after not having done so for almost 10 years was insanely intense, and everytime after has been that much better. He says he loves me, and made mistakes in all the choices he made in the past. Do I beleive him...I don't know. Part of me wants to...so I continue with the affair. He has a W and 3 children, and I and my H are pretty happy with our life. My child considers my H her dad and rarely sees, b/c she doesn't really want to, except for her sisters, her father.
Neither of us will ever leave our marriage...and as for me, when and if the affair ends...I won't have another affair. This one only happened b/c of the familiarity and history we have. The guilt is enough with this one...
iVillage Member
Registered: 01-15-2008
Tue, 06-03-2008 - 8:54am

For those of you have had an affair or would consider an affair this question is for you, Do you think you could have an affair that was just sexual with no emotions envolved?


I have not had one. However in my ML relationship, I have considered if this would be an option. I think initially

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-09-1998
Tue, 06-03-2008 - 9:01am

((((HUGS)))) Ragingangel...I am so sorry your life has been like this for the last 6 years and that you have lost all those that you thought cared for you.


You are a strong woman and you can do this. And when it is over you will have the satisfation that you made it through this.


We are here for you and you can always vent your frustrations to us...


{{{HUGS}}}







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Beach anyone?
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Registered: 08-01-2006
Tue, 06-03-2008 - 9:02am
Hi and welcome crazysexyangel. Nice to meet you. Will you please fill in your profile so we can know something about you? Thanks! Stick around and jump in anytime. The people here are great.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 04-26-2008
Tue, 06-03-2008 - 9:24am

THANK YOU!

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iVillage Member
Registered: 04-26-2008
Tue, 06-03-2008 - 9:39am

I always thought it was weird because here I am a person with an extra HL having two relationships with women were I have little to no sex(DW) and no sex at all.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 04-26-2008
Tue, 06-03-2008 - 9:43am

I could have written this post myself....{sigh}


If you don't mind me asking galatea are you in a similar or some what similar situation?

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iVillage Member
Registered: 04-26-2008
Tue, 06-03-2008 - 9:44am

Thank you!

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