sexual fantasy with husband . help please

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-06-2005
sexual fantasy with husband . help please
12
Wed, 02-01-2012 - 12:38pm
I always had fantasy to have a 3some with husband and another girl. Finally last month we were able to satisfy that. Ever since day one me and husband agreed upon doing this and had the consequences this can bring to our marriage but we agree that this was mainly for pleasure and fantacy. However my husband and I both have her as a contact In our blackberry, yesterday he told me she wanted to come to home cause apparently she didn't to go to collage, I work from home so I found that awkward cause I really wasn't going to be able to pay attention to her so I told my husband it wasn't a good idea but he isnsited it will be ok. She just wanted to hang out so I agree. As soon as she arrives I felt weird but I acted normal. She came to my room where I work and sat in my bed texting. We talked and stuff. Then husband came to the room sat in bed and started calling her to move his side so I found that strange as I was working. Well then he gets out of room and texted me saying she wanted to have sex with us. I told husnad I couldn't cause of work. He said get into things if I get I call I would get out. I said ok but I know wouldn't be able to do it. So he get in room and starts touching her. Get into things with her with me watching. I felt unfortable so letf room and left them there. I came into room mainutes later to find them both naked him doing oral sex to her. He asked me to kis her so I did. But I didn't stay I went back out. Keep working and like 10 or 20 minutes later he gets out of the room smiling. I felt so betrayed hurt and sick to my stomack. I found on his BB he was texting her he wanted to do oral sex . All this behind my back. Now is this ok I feel this way or am I overreacting???

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iVillage Member
Registered: 09-06-2005
Mon, 02-06-2012 - 8:05am
Oh that's nice. I'll be in Mass in a couple of weeks again I can't wait. I love Mass. Have a wonderful day!
iVillage Member
Registered: 08-01-2006
Mon, 02-06-2012 - 7:59am

I'm originally from Watertown, MA. Hubby and I moved up here about 10 years ago.



28999825.jpg picture by nhgal2006

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-06-2005
Mon, 02-06-2012 - 7:38am
Oh waooo I lived close by for many years I'm from Mass. Lived in Lawrence and Methuen. In fact I was just there for 5 months taking care of my ill mom. Nice to meet you. Sorry didn't even noticed yeah you nick. Lol. Thanks
iVillage Member
Registered: 08-01-2006
Mon, 02-06-2012 - 7:25am

lol... If that question was to me, I am female, hence the "gal" in my screen name. I live in New Hampshire.



28999825.jpg picture by nhgal2006

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-06-2005
Fri, 02-03-2012 - 2:42pm
Yes we did talked about her and have agreed that we not longer will be contacting her . I do think she came predetermined on what she wanted. And now we both have to adhere to the rules and the new person we find as well will be advise of such rules. I'm glad u commented about those certain rules its exactly those rules I'm setting in.. Questions? Are u male or female, where from? U seem like a nice person to talk to. Thanks for comments
iVillage Member
Registered: 08-01-2006
Fri, 02-03-2012 - 11:00am

I am so glad to hear this. Questions, if you don't mind. This other women seemed like maybe she was the instigator, have you and hubby talked about being with her again? Maybe find someone else who is going to abide by the rules?



28999825.jpg picture by nhgal2006

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-06-2005
Fri, 02-03-2012 - 10:54am
Yes we definetely learned from it. We been talking about it and agree things got out of hand. At least hubby apologized and was very sorry for doing what he did and I took my responsibilitly as well. Thanks for you comment. It help out!
iVillage Member
Registered: 08-01-2006
Fri, 02-03-2012 - 10:38am

Let this be a learning experience for both of you. I hope it all works out for you.



28999825.jpg picture by nhgal2006

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-06-2005
Thu, 02-02-2012 - 1:49pm
Its true going back to it I did gave a lot of room for it to happend, and he told me same thing he said if I have said NO I don't want to period then he would have just back out and left it alone. We did discussed about what's allow and not but guess we didn't followed and the biggest mistake was that and I guess that's when I started to feel weird when I saw him kissing her like he does to me and also the biggest mistake was not using a condom now I regret every bit of it and ready to start testing for STD's.
iVillage Member
Registered: 08-01-2006
Thu, 02-02-2012 - 1:17pm

You can feel the way you do and that's ok. I don't think you're overreacting, but at the same time I do think you should have just put your foot down and said NO to it all. You gave in at every request that your husband asked, then you left the room, came back, joined in, left again, and came back. You shouldn't have done that if you really didn't want to. As far as him texting with her behind your back, well, when the two of you had discussed a 3some, how much did you actually talk about it, and did you make a list of rules that were to be followed? Such as no communicating without the other person there, no oral, no tongue kissing, no intercourse without condoms, etc?



28999825.jpg picture by nhgal2006

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