Would you rather watch or be watched?

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-15-2007
Would you rather watch or be watched?
101
Thu, 05-19-2011 - 1:42pm

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iVillage Member
Registered: 04-26-2011
Tue, 05-24-2011 - 4:25pm
First off, bonus points for spelling Maksim's name correctly. That takes a bit of skill right there :) And to other readers in general, I'm making generalization given my experience talking to and trying to understand women. I'll be happy to stand corrected.

All i'm trying to say is that women do longingly look at men. You stated it has never happened to you, and I was surprised that it wasn't.

The rest is theoretical, but I'd sum it up this way. Guys, in general, are conditioned that it is ok to look, and they are primarily visual creatures, so even polite ones can be caught drooling ;)

Women, often, are raised not to look, not to show interest even, and often require mood/comfort/safety to allow for other attractors to kick in. I mean, check out the scene at a showing of Twilight movies ;) My wife noticed just how many scenes Thor had that were shirtless ;)

I don't think all of this is culture, I think some of it is genetics, biology. etc... And i'm speaking in generalities. But if you are jealous and want attention for your physique, you may have to find places or activities that find encourage the display.
I've been the fly on the wall during trips to the beach when female friends made comments on men walking by.

Or you could dance for Chippendales ;)

I do know that "not on a level that satisfies me" doesn't mean that women or culture is going to adjust itself. You may need to seek outlets that give you the validation you are looking for, or learn to see the subtler signs. Just depends on what you want, I think.

I don't think, jsut to help, that women are looking at " the clothes". Its the total package, so to speak, and that can be with looser or tighter clothes. But its part of, I dont' think women look/evaluate guys the same way we look at them. Generally.



iVillage Member
Registered: 02-15-2007
Tue, 05-24-2011 - 5:20pm

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-09-2009
Tue, 05-24-2011 - 5:43pm

Hey, BL,

Since you made the comment, "lol... Well, sure, we all get/have gotten/have given those looks. That's just part of life."

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-20-2007
Tue, 05-24-2011 - 8:35pm

I agree with you, Quixotic. We women, especially those of us that were raised in the South and were tomboys, got used to being told to be ladies. We were told that it's not polite to stare, that we shouldn't be too forward with boys, to not hang out with the bad boys or we'd get into trouble (ie, get a bad reputation or get pregnant). Women do like to look at men, but we do it in more subtle ways. Men, as you said, are a lot more visual than women, which is why visual porn is geared toward men. Written porn/erotica is geared toward women. But believe me, women do like to look, which is why I love the movies like "300" (full of eye candy as one of my gay friends says). We just don't act like a male dog after a female dog in heat as I've seen some men behave. It always amazes me how some (ok, a lot) of women act when they see a woman's bare breasts. I'm always thinking, "Geeze, they're just breasts. All women have them." But apparently men go ga-ga over a pair of appendages.

I agree, too, that for this woman, the total package is what is important. I personally love seeing a man in a uniform, but that might just be because I'm a military brat. And it's not just the man's physical looks that go with that. It's everything that military uniform stands for: courage, faithfulness, intelligence, strength, etc.


iVillage Member
Registered: 08-01-2006
Tue, 05-24-2011 - 9:22pm

I was walking into the grocery store the other day and there was a nice looking youngish (they're all young to me) woman in front of me, obviously attractive.



28999825.jpg picture by nhgal2006

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-01-2006
Tue, 05-24-2011 - 9:26pm

Personally, I don't think some women do it in a way that it gets noticed much. Me, being a married women, would not think of looking at a man like that and get caught because it would send the wrong signals. I also think some women just have a better way of hiding it so it doesn't get noticed.



28999825.jpg picture by nhgal2006

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-01-2006
Tue, 05-24-2011 - 9:35pm

I don't think, jsut to help, that women are looking at " the clothes". Its the total package, so to speak, and that can be with looser or tighter clothes. But its part of, I dont' think women look/evaluate guys the same way we look at them. Generally.



28999825.jpg picture by nhgal2006

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-15-2006
Tue, 05-24-2011 - 10:25pm
QuixoticMale wrote:
, I dont' think women look/evaluate guys the same way we look at them. Generally.



Generally no LOL

Then again it all depends.

Take me for example. I can appreciate a fiiiiine looking man. The looks however would not be what hooks me and certainly wouldn't keep me. I think the older I get the less I want window dressing and the more I want substance.

(smiling)

Mrs P

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-15-2006
Tue, 05-24-2011 - 10:40pm
tom.j.g wrote:

Mrs P

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-15-2006
Tue, 05-24-2011 - 10:42pm
Hi Roberto! It's good to see you here!

Mrs P

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