Advice - to go exclusive or not?

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-28-2005
Advice - to go exclusive or not?
2
Wed, 09-21-2005 - 1:57pm

I'm cross posting from Single Life...as I think this forum might be more appropriate for the following...

I'm looking for some other opinions on what to do here. This might be a long explanation - so hang in there!

I've had a profile on an internet dating site for about a month. In that time, I've met 5 guys in person and I have another one who I'm still just corresponding with via email. I've already "ruled out" 3 guys and I've told them that I'm not romantically interested in them.
When it comes to the other 3 -
Bachelor # 1 - I really, really like this guy. We've been on a couple of dates, he's brought me flowers, I made him dinner - he even spent the night. Now he's off on vacation...and it truly feels like absence makes the heart grow even fonder in this case.

Bachelor #2 - Only been on 1 date - he's a nice guy, but I didn't really get to know him very well. I definitely think we could be friends - we'd have to go out more for me to see if there's more there.

Bachelor #3 (email only) - He seems very nice in emails, but I never get a true reading on a person and my feelings for them until we meet in person.

So - the crux of the issue is, I really like Bachelor #1 - but it's only been a few weeks. I feel like if I tell #2 & #3 that I'm going to stop dating other people, I might be putting all my eggs in one basket, so to speak.

I'm not sure if I should discuss this with Bach#1, because I'm afraid it might scare him away. I just wonder if it's really fair to the other guys that I'm going out with them, but comparing them to Bach#1 the whole time.

Thoughts? Advice? What would you do?

Thanks!!

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-24-2004
Wed, 09-21-2005 - 8:36pm
I think it's a little early to stop all other dating and try to be exclusive with bach #1. Especially if he hasn't asked you, yet. One of the other two guys could end up being a much better bf than bach #1. A lot of people date a couple of people at once. As long as you're not exclusive with any of them, you owe no one any explaination.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 04-15-2003
Thu, 09-22-2005 - 1:25pm
I agree. There is no rush. Take your time and enjoy the ride!
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