After two years...I'm still hung up
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| Wed, 03-01-2006 - 12:13am |
I had dated my boyfriend Eric for a little over a year back in May 2003-June 2004. We had gotten into a car accident together (which includes lawsuits) in May of 2004 and things just fell apart. It took me a long time to get over him and move on. I dated Tony in Jan 2005 till Nov 2005. But right after I stopped dating Tony, I talked to Eric and found out that he was single. The whole time I dated Tony and even after me and Eric broke up, I still haven't gotten over Eric. I have been hung up over him forever! I blame myself for our breakup because I changed, but people tell me not too, he needed to comfort me during the accident period, which he didn't.
When I saw Eric in Dec 2005, I found out he was single. I called him a few days later and asked him to hang out sometime and he told me sure. He didn't call me until Jan 2006. Meanwhile I started dating someone else. This was a big mistake! (My sister even told me and now I realize I should have never started dating anyone after the breakup with Tony, and let alone not getting over Eric as well)
I started dating the “new kid” in Jan 2006 and Eric called me a few times while I was dating the "new kid" and he finally found out that I started dating someone else, so he seemed to have stopped calling. Now I'm upset with myself because:
a) I started dating someone and now I don't know what to do
b) I don't want to date the "new kid" anymore (it was simply a rebound)
c) I'm comparing the new kid to Eric every single time!
My “new boyfriend” went away on a trip for a full week, and so I called Eric to tell him that I had a few things to talk about with him. (This would be my feelings and such toward him). I need to get all of these feelings off my chest, and so he told me that that sounds fine, and that he'll call me the next day, but he never did! I don't understand.
Eric understands that my new boyfriend went away and agreed that he would hang out with me. I just don't understand. I'm so sad, and Eric was the only boyfriend I dated for longer than a year, and we've been through a lot. I pictured myself marrying him and having kids with him! It's just so hard to let him go. He seems like he really wants to hang out with me, but I'm not going to call him, he knows I'm here and he knows I wanted to talk to him. But I'm just so confused....what do you all think is going on in his head?? What do you guys think his intensions are? I haven't been happy since we were together! I'm so sad! I could go on and on about this relationship, but I’m just summarizing it. Please help my caring friends.

designlisa...
Pianoguy can only speculate, but here goes:
If ERIC was truly "the one"----you wouldn't have turned to others. Irregardless of whether you were happy with them or not...there had to be reason you needed to date other men?
I honestly think you've got a good friendship with ERIC. However...if you're looking for something more permanent, I DON'T THINK HE'S "THE ONE?"
Pianoguy
>>The whole time I dated Tony and even after me and Eric broke up, I still haven't gotten over Eric. I have been hung up over him forever!
You need to get over Eric before you can resume a relationship with him, otherwise you will simply repeat the same mistakes that led to your first break up; however
>>he needed to comfort me during the accident period, which he didn't
Is clearly a deal breaker. You want to marry this guy? Marriage is supposed to be "in sickness and in health". You're lucky that you knew him long enough to find this out about him...before making a lifetime commitment.
Just keep repeating that to yourself every time you think about him, and in a year's time, provided you don't contact him, I guarantee you will be over him. Good for your friends for bringing up this valid point! Go friends!
Also, about your emotional cheating on the "new kid"...
>>My “new boyfriend” went away on a trip for a full week, and so I called Eric to tell him that I had a few things to talk about with him.
...is probably rubbing Eric the wrong way, and rightly so. Why are you still together with "new kid" if you're dissing him behind his back?
Your "house" needs a spring cleaning! No wonder you are confused!!