am i just his friend?

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-14-2004
am i just his friend?
5
Mon, 06-14-2004 - 12:26am
I have been friends with this guy off and on for about 8 years. We used to work together and now he works at another office. We've been friends through my marriage, kids, relationships, deaths, you name it. I can call him up tomorrow and he'd be there for me. The thing is, we've recently started hanging out again. We've always had some chemistry. He recently invited me to his parents house to meet them. We also go out with a group and it's just taken for granted that we're the "couple" in the group. He buys me drinks, pays my way into clubs, etc. etc. We always flirt, talk about the stuff that has happened in the past. He just doesn't follow up on it. At the end of the night there is no 'I'll call you, You call me'. The next time something is happening I'll call and invite him out. He's always game, but I feel like I'm always doing the inviting. I feel like if I didn't call him, I wouldn't see him for monthes.(he lives in the next town) Is he into me, afraid to ask for more, or am I just wishful thinking, and he's just a friend?
iVillage Member
Registered: 10-12-2003
Mon, 06-14-2004 - 1:50am
i think this fella likes you alot. he has been there for you as a good friend and what more would it be as having a best friend be a lover too! i think there's a plus here. guys arent into labelling things as girls are. just let it flow and soon enough he will keep letting you know and if you are willing that you two are a couple.
iVillage Member
Registered: 05-22-2004
Mon, 06-14-2004 - 1:27pm
I think he views you as just a friend as he is not pursuing spending time with you.

Lilypie Baby Days<

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-14-2004
Mon, 06-14-2004 - 11:00pm
Thanks for your response to my question. Have you ever had a relationship with someone like this? And if so, how did it turn out? We've been intimate a few times, but it's just casual. I've had male friends before, and he's not like them. My other guy friends and I didn't sleep together. I just knew it wouldn't go there. This guy drives me crazy! Thanks for your response tho.
iVillage Member
Registered: 06-13-2004
Tue, 06-15-2004 - 3:09pm
I think you are just seen as his friend because he would try to spend time with you as much as possible if he wanted it to go farther. The worst thing you could do is sleep with him on a casual basis --your a friend plus some. He is getting the milk without even having to deal with the cow. (not that your a cow-you know what I meant) Break off all ties and see what happens--or just be open and talk with him about what your feeling and see what he says, couldn't hurt!
iVillage Member
Registered: 05-26-2004
Wed, 06-16-2004 - 1:58pm
Well this is certainly a whole new aspect that wasnt in your original post....If you are sleeping together, and he is only seeing you when you are pursuing...how is that rewarding to you?

Lilypie Baby Days