Are these dates or just hangouts? I'm so confused!

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anonymous user
Registered: 12-31-1969
Are these dates or just hangouts? I'm so confused!
Fri, 09-21-2012 - 6:47pm

Ok.  Here's the deal:

There is this guy that I used to be friends with in high school (about 10 years ago).  We've been friends on Facebook for a while, but never really talked to one another.  However, recently he started "liking" my photos, commenting on my statuses, and the like.  Last week he asked me out of the blue if I wanted to go to the Orchard and hiking with him.  That "date" (or what I think might have been a date) happened last Sunday.  It was fun and we ended the afternoon with a hug.  He texted me as soon as I got home.  

He has been texting me every single day this week asking me how I'm doing and just initiating just basic conversation.  Yesterday he invited me to go hiking with him at one of our state parks, and I went.  It was fun.  I flirted around with him to see if he would "bite", and it seemed to work a little, but I'm not sure. He even paid for dinner afterwards.  When he dropped me off at my house, I got another hug.  Yay.  He text me as soon as he got home.  Basic conversation about how he had a great time, blah, blah, blah.  

Today he asked me to go to a movie with him.  I went, he paid, it was fun.  When we were done, another hug (sigh).  More texting when I got home.  

I am just having trouble reading what is going on.  I'm a single mother with a 2 year old, and I've never been a traditional dater.  Every date I have ever been on has ended with at least a kiss.  So this is all new to me.  I know he's not a shy guy.  He's a big talker and even initiates conversation with complete strangers.  

I just don't understand what is going on.  Does he like me?  Are these dates?  If so, how long should I wait for a dang kiss?  I don't want to initiate it for fear of reading too much everything and the resulting rejection.  I also don't want to ask him because I don't want to pressure him into something he's not comfortable with or ready for.  *Sigh*



False alarm, friends!  He IS into me.  I got a nice big make-out session this evening and it was AMAZING.  :smileyhappy:  

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-27-2010
Fri, 09-21-2012 - 7:12pm

Sounds like it could go either way.  My dd goes with male friends on hikes, movies and dinner lots and they end in a hug as they are only friends.  So maybe you just need to give it more time or alcohol (I do not drink so I say this as a joke) and see where it goes.

Can somebody out there suggest a movie with this same plot:smileyhappy:


iVillage Member
Registered: 11-28-1999
Fri, 09-21-2012 - 7:34pm

It's hard to tell from this whether he sees you as a good friend or has any romantic interest in you.  I think as time goes on, if he just continues to hug you and doesn't do anything romantic, like hold your hand, put his arm around you, or say anything flirty, then it's friendship.  I think it would be very awkard to come right out & ask him at this point.

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-27-2010
Tue, 09-25-2012 - 10:38am
Too funny!!!
iVillage Member
Registered: 07-17-2009
Wed, 09-26-2012 - 10:17pm

I believe that is proving that man is just being your friend as long as he doesn't do the romantic things. Go and find someone who wants to fall in love with you. I don't think he will be likely to be a material boyfriend.