Are we just friends or dating?
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Are we just friends or dating?
| Sun, 04-23-2006 - 10:07am |
My dad "set me up" with a guy he works with. Both of us were engaged to other people about 6 months ago and it didn't work out for either of us. So he emailed me and we started talking. He ended up calling me every single day. He invited me to go on a weekend ski trip with him, just the 2 of us. We had a great time. Over the past 2 months, he has continued to call me every day and asked me to do something fun with him at least twice a week, and I did. He told me that he just wanted to be friends because he was still upset about his ex and wasn't ready to date again yet. However, I feel like we have been dating because we spend so much time together. He has never kissed me, but it's not like he's afraid to touch me at all. He hugs me a lot. I don't understand what he wants. I think he is one of the most amazing guys I have ever met. I care about him a lot, and wish he could start a real relationship with me. What should I do? How can I tell how he really feels about me? It seems like he says one thing and acts another way.

You're friends with the possibility of more when he feels ready. It sounds to me like he's been pretty clear about that.
If you can't handle it, then stop hanging out with him.
Sheri
Don't think too much at this stage. If you like him and then go with flow. I think a healthy relationship usually starts with a good friendship and what he is doing right now is very normal and reasonable. Do you really like to marry a guy who jumps to a new relationship soon after his previous one gone bad? You have to be patient if you want to keep seeing him.
Of course if after 1 year and he is still not ready for anything, then leave him. While dating him, you have to keep asking yourself if you like him or not, if he has any dealbreakers to help you decide if you want to invest your time and engery on him.
Good luck!