Are we together or not?
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Are we together or not?
| Mon, 05-17-2004 - 12:38pm |
My boyfriend and I were together long distance for a year then he moved back to our home town in the past 4 months. He is the only man I have dated that has really had an effect on me. He has inspired me to read more books, watch the news and think more critically about what is going on in the world. His family and I are very close...his mom is one of my closest friends and his sister is basically my little sister. Anyways, I had an emotional breakdown the night that he planned a very sweet romantic evening and I broke up with him. I think it was the wine that made me do it...so the next day I wanted to get back together. He really did not think it was a good idea. He thinks he is not good for me. Anyways, a couple days later...he starts asking me out to dinner, picks me up at the airport...does all of these unusually sweet things....again he kept saying that we are not together. Since then he has invited me to fly with him and his family to a large family reunion in August. I am over his house all of the time, I sleep over on weekends. But sometimes I feel like he still thinks we are not together. He is very hard headed and has had his heart broken before. Sometimes he looks at me like he really adores me and other times it feels like he is annoyed by me. WHAT ARE WE??? Is he my boyfriend or not?

It sounds like he is a great guy, and maybe he misses you. Talk with him about what the two of you are doing. No one here can tell you if you are back together. You must talk to him. It certainly sounds like the two of you are back together, he is just affraid of being hurt by you.
Let him know how you feel about him and he will probably open up to you.
Give it a shot.
Good luck
Why do women do this? If you want to date to form a relationship - and for whatever reason it ends...that's like a "meal of a menu for a set price".
So, if he doesn't want what you want.....or if you two don't share values and goals na ddefinitions of a great relationship - if you're going to continue hang out and let him "go around the buffet" thinking that he'll want to pay more (have the relationship) after a few more free rounds -y ou're outta your mind.
You're being free, easy, convenient, comforting, non-oobligator with your time, and body - at a minimum. And he's simply availing himself of the benefits of a ree offering
IF after a week, or a month or even two months you said - I want the obligations resstored, the commitments remade - he'd go "no, if it's not a no-obligation to me buffet, I'm going elsewhere."
You know it...that is why you don't say anything now.
Erin
quickblade14@hotmail.com