Asking out a geek

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-03-2004
Asking out a geek
5
Tue, 11-15-2005 - 4:41pm
OK, I'm a college student, and I'm totally smitten with this guy. Problem is, I have no idea how to approach him because he has never dated a girl before. I don't even know if he's had a girl show interest in him before. It's not that there's anything wrong with him, it's just one of those things. We talk to each other and we are friendly, so he knows who I am. I know that he's a shy guy, and if I just went up and asked him out, I'd probably scare the crap out of him. So, any suggestions, ideas, advice? Thanks so much.
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
In reply to: iruvane
Tue, 11-15-2005 - 5:30pm

iruvane...

Pianoguy suggests the "snail mail friendship card" approach.

Pick out a nice (NOT MUSHY) friendship card. It can contain a little humor if you think the man can handle it. But what it MUST INCLUDE is a short, hand-written note from you that indicates how much you've enjoyed the chats he has shared with you in the past. Then you can casually ask:

"Would you be interested in going out with me sometime?"

Depending upon whether you get a response to the card (or not)---you'll pretty much have your answer!

GOOD LUCK!

Pianoguy

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-14-2003
In reply to: iruvane
Wed, 11-16-2005 - 10:38am

I'd take the coffee approach here. "Hey, I'm going to the student center for a cup of coffee, wanna come?"

That's so nonchalant, he won't realize he is on a very benign date.

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-19-2004
In reply to: iruvane
Wed, 11-16-2005 - 11:00am

Yeah one thing would be not to refer to him as a geek. Not a very nice thing to call someone.

Just ask him out for coffee after class to "discuss" something in class and then take it from there.

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-06-2004
In reply to: iruvane
Wed, 11-16-2005 - 1:11pm
I've been in a similar situation like this before. The key is to not be aggressive. You have to find that perfect balance of taking control and and letting him warm up to you. If he's never had a girl interested in him before, he probably has a little low self-esteem so compliment him on the things that matter. That way he won't think you are too out of his league and get scared.
iVillage Member
Registered: 12-23-2003
In reply to: iruvane
Wed, 11-16-2005 - 5:25pm

ITA with Chamey and Sally.

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