Baffled
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| Fri, 09-24-2004 - 11:39pm |
There's a man I was interested in at the office (we both started a new job with the company a month or so ago). I thought he was interested in me as well--I would catch him looking at me and he would pay attention to me in social situations, etc. The usual signs. I'm usually really accurate at telling when a man is interested, and this guy seemed like a given. So I asked him out--no pressure, just would he like to have a drink with me that weekend (this was a week ago). He said he'd like to, but he had company visiting him from out of town and could we do it next week instead. I said sure, but then this past week he's been acting really strange and awkward around me. Avoiding talking to me, etc. Neither of us has brought up the date invite. I'm okay with the fact that I clearly misread his friendliess and I haven't pursued it any further. I think he's being a bit of a jerk about the thing actually, and I am certainly not interested anymore. But we still have to work together and see each other frequently in meetings (we work at an ad agency and we're working on the same account) and at social networking-type functions and I would rather not have all this weird awkwardness going on. Why is this guy being so strange? It's not like I professed eternal love for him or anything, it was just a stupid date. I know it's always risky to dip your pen in the office ink, and I had considered the fact that things might be awkward if we dated and it didn't work out, but I never thought this weirdness could happen sans date. Anyway, does anyone have any advice about how to get myself out of this? I'd rather this guy didn't flee into the men's room upon seeing me all the time.
Thanks!
Stephanie

As for the other poster, I'm so tired of all this "rules" stuff that says women shouldn't ever ask a man out. Please. I am a confident, assertive, attractive woman and when I want something I go get it--be it a man, a job, or whatever. Any man who can't handle an assertive woman who isn't simply moping around the house waiting for prince charming to ride up on his horse and sweep her off her feet isn't for me. Why have we decided to glorify this passive role for women in initiating relationships? Who says an active, confident woman isn't sexy? I fail to see how the issue is linked to pride. It's the fact that I do have pride in who I am and what I have to offer that I don't need to sit around waiting for some guy to come along and decide he wants to ask me out. Why should men get all the power? Anyway, I've asked men out in the past and have always had good results--this most recent guy just seems to be an aberration, which is what left me confused.