A Big Difference

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-19-2004
A Big Difference
3
Mon, 05-03-2004 - 11:09am
I have been with my new guy for just less than a week, and I am finding myself getting worried about his feelings for me, already. The problem is that I just got out of a horrible, unhealthy relationship recently with a guy who was possesive, jealous, obssesed, etc. He completely smothered me and we were ALWAYS togehter during are free time. He was not social at all so whenever we were together, it was just the two of us. I couldn't stand it. I decided that I wanted the opposite of that. I wanted a social, friendly, easy-going guy. Well, I got that. As much as I love it, I am not used to it. I am not used to him hanging out with people. I am not used to not doing everything together. I find myself getting nervous that he doesn't like me as much as he says because of the fact that he isn't as "obssesed" with me. I feel like I am turning into my exboyfriend now, and that is the last thing I want to do. How do I keep this guy interested without scaring him off by doing all I can to keep him? I don't want to question him, but I want reassurance. Help!

Mary
iVillage Member
Registered: 01-19-2004
Mon, 05-03-2004 - 11:57am
Well i understand what you going through, it sounds tuff, all i can say is when you are feeling this way towards your new guy remind yourself of why you are feeling it. If he says he cares for you and wants to do things with you when both your schedules are free than you have nothing to worry about. It has only been a week of dating, just calm down and treat this like it is a new relationship, and enjoy it without all this stress.

good luck

Carrie
iVillage Member
Registered: 12-23-2003
Mon, 05-03-2004 - 12:05pm

How in the world can you

 Start

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-13-2003
Mon, 05-03-2004 - 3:41pm
Um...if you "just" got out of a bad relationship and you're "needing reassurance" and "worrying" about a guy you have "been with" for LESS THAN A WEEK, I'd say those are two clear signs that you are not yet ready to enter into another relationship at this time. Take some time to yourself, fully grieve the loss of your last relationship until you can let it go, think over what you learned from the experience, get emotionally healthy and develop a strong self-esteem, and THEN start thinking about dating. Good luck!