Blown it?
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| Fri, 07-07-2006 - 9:57pm |
I had just started seeing a guy for a few months, and really like him. Things were going rather well recently, although after spending the weekend with him, some things came out in conversation that made me think.
He broke up with his ex last January, and she had previously been living with him for a few months in this new house of his. They've known each other for 10 years, and were together on and off, but mostly for the last 3 years before their split in january.
Initially, when I met him, he said that his working all the time and having no time for her was the reason for their split..but the real reason is because she wanted to marry him, and after thinking about it, he didn't feel she was the one for him..as it was more of a friendship than an 'in love' relationship.
After I stayed at his house it was evident that his ex has left some of her possessions behind, at his house. Nothing that looks as if she lives there now, just possessions, like her bike which is still in the hall, and some other bits that he's put away in a box, like previous school work.
I found out, in conversation, that his ex still has the keys to his house, and although he said she won't give them back, it seems odd to me, as they broke up in January, so it's now 5 months later. He said he's over her, although he's known her for 10 years, so won't forget her completely.
After spending the weekend with him, on my return home, it came out by text that I sensed he wasn't quite over his ex, and that exes don't have keys to your house, which I deeply regret sending.
I sent him an email apologising, and he replied saying he felt hurt and insulted by the text, but didn't want us to fall out, and that we should talk sometime. I tried calling him, but got no reply. He owns 2 companies, so is working 24/7, but I am feeling he's avoiding me. I did send him a text, saying I had called a few times, but I'll give him space, as it felt as if he didn't want to talk.
Have I blown it? Is it over? Has he lost interest? Do you think he's called his ex to sort this situation out? Maybe they've got back together? He's my boyfriend, yet I haven't heard from him in almost 3 weeks.
Advice needed.

IMHO, ten years together cannot be forgotten in 5 months. You've been seeing him for a few months only so you don't even know what he's thinking. If you felt that the situation was not a good one it was your right to address it in the way you saw fit. It appears though that the message you sent him made him change his mind and he may not be calling you again at all. The "we should talk sometime" has the "see ya" signature to it.
I'd move on and if he calls it's fine and if he doesn't then it'll be nhis loss.
katy3816...
PG has 3 thoughts after reading your post:
1. If the b/f was TRULY OVER THE EX....he could've changed the locks on his door preventing access (by her) to his place.
2. If the b/f still communicates with the ex (by text, phone or email)...you either have to accept this...or dump him! The pattern will continue indefinitely
3. I'd seriously consider taking a break for a month. This way...the man will have time to sort out his feelings for you...as well as the ex...and hopefully decide which of you is more important in his life?
Pianoguy