boy is shy...make the first move?

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-21-2004
boy is shy...make the first move?
3
Sat, 06-26-2004 - 1:21am
I'm dating someone I think I kinda like (this is unusual). He's really, really, really shy. I don't think he's had much experience with women. Problem is, I've barely had any experience with men! (I am a 26-y-o "virgin"). I think there's a chance he might like me, but I can't see him ever doing anything about it. I don't know how to kiss someone first or anything like that (I've only done that when HEAVILY intoxicated and I don't know the other person). So what do I do??
iVillage Member
Registered: 06-13-2004
Sun, 06-27-2004 - 9:52am
hmmm...let's see---you are Both shy? Is that it? If you guys are dating--then just sit down and talk to him about it. Maybe make some comment like--do you think you'll ever kiss me? Give him a hint--are you absolutely sure you guys are dating if you have never even kissed--? Once you sit down and talk to him and know where you stand if he still doesn't get the hint and kiss you--maybe make dinner--have a glass of wine to loosen everyone up and I would plant one on him and see how it goes.
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-21-2004
Sun, 06-27-2004 - 3:18pm
well we are "dating" in the sense that we are going out on dates, not in the sense that we like each other (we met on online personals, the only place I've met any guys). I don't know if we like each other yet. If he kisses me, I'll know he likes me and then we will be "dating" in that sense. But the problem is, he seems too shy to kiss me even if did like me.
iVillage Member
Registered: 06-07-2004
Sun, 06-27-2004 - 9:22pm
Hi Buggie,

I was in your boat a few months ago. I just started dating the guy that I'm dating right now and I had the initial concerns you did. I remember after our second date, I wanted to kiss him good night and it didn't happen and I felt like such a moron afterwards. Also, I'm kind of the old fashioned gal who wants the guy to make the first move (partly due to my inexperience) But on our third date, we had an opportunity to get to know each other afterwards and the the timing was perfect. Words can't even describe it although it was pretty casual. I'd just say don't worry too much about it. If you guys are still going out and doing stuff together, he's still interested. And the perfect moment will come eventually just don't think too much about it. And things will come naturally from there. And if it doesn't at least the guy didn't try to take advantage of you physically or anything, he respected you.