Boyfriend Lying to me

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-09-2004
Boyfriend Lying to me
3
Tue, 11-09-2004 - 7:49am
I have been with him for 6mons and we live together. This is going to be lengthy due to all thats been done.

First about 2mons ago he told me i was talking in my sleep about someone named Dee, Which is my ex boyfriend. He said I was saying how i missed him and how much O wanted him back. Then he said that one night I was having a sexual dream about Dee and I was saying that I wanted him to make love to me and how it felt so good. Well a few days later I bought a new purse and as I was cleaning the old one out I came across a letter from Dee that he wrote to me when we were together. I just left it in there. Then Bill my boyfriend says can I see your old purse so then as he is glancing through it says to me how did you fit all that stuff in here. Then he said oh there is a paper you left in there. So I took it out and ripped it up. Well he continued with well i hope that wasn't a receipt for the layaway that i gave u. I said no its something that i should of thrown away awhile ago.

My opinion on this situation is that he went through my purse before the so called talkin in my sleep happen and he found that note and then plotted to find out if i was cheating on him.

My next issue with this relationship is that I also just found out that he has been lying to me. THe lies have to do with money we had a joint acct after I left my job to go back to school F/T. He was taking care of the bills. Well it was time for my car payment and my car insurance. He said there was enough money to cover both bills wrote out the checks well come to find out the checks bounced I had to borrow money from my family. He said that some frauduantly took money from the acct and the bank was looking into it. Well there was never any money taken from the acct fraudantly I called the bank.

Money troubles cont to get worse he had five buxs left til payday goes to buy cigs comes home with 4 packs. So I asked how did he get 4pks he says oh I got an advance from work til payday. Well 2days later my mom comes to me with I wasn't suppose to tell you this but I have to its not right . Bill borrowed 60 dollars from her boyfriend. Told him not to tell anyone.

Please tell me what you think. I have issues with lying and my trust in him is gone. my heart tells me to end the relationship and move on.

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-20-2004
Tue, 11-09-2004 - 8:45am
Honestly I highly doubt you were talking in your sleep about your ex boyfriend. Nope just don't buy it.

He's bouncing checks to bills that are in your name and you're living with someone you've only known for 6 months.

I think this a nightmare. It will only get worse.

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-26-2004
Tue, 11-09-2004 - 11:33am
Listen to what your heart is telling you (ie, the last words in your post).
iVillage Member
Registered: 11-09-2004
Tue, 11-09-2004 - 5:07pm
hey...

i hope ure feeling better. seems to me like you should seriously sit your boyf down and have a good chat with him. you should come out straight with the money thing. it doesnt seem like a healthy situation to me. im sorry to be so harsh. he doesnt trust you and you dont trust him, to put it bluntly. you neeed to ask him why he doesnt trust that your feelings are true to him. which they obviously are, because uve spent so much time worrying about this situation. the other thing is that because he knows he is sneaking about. he might subconsciously think that you are doing the same. ive been in a similar sort of situation. its the worst feeling in the world not to trust someone. u think, where has all the trust gone? best thing to do is be honest, before you become entwined in more lies..good luck and i really hope it works out for the both of u. and if he doesnt realise it, its his loss.