Boyfriend Trouble

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-13-2004
Boyfriend Trouble
1
Mon, 09-13-2004 - 9:19am
My boyfriend and i have been together for a while now and are engaged to be married. My problem is that he is very insecure about a lot of things. He's led a very hard life, and everyone he's ever trusted has screwed him over. Even his own mother. I'm two hours away from him going to school, and he has a real rough time having me over here. I stay in my room most of the day unless i go out to class or to the cafeteria to eat. It hurts me a lot because he's always accusing me of being with someone else or lying to him. I've given him a lot. I lost my virginity to him and I give everything I can to him. Is there anything i can do to make him less jelous and insecure?
Visitor (not verified)
anonymous user
Mon, 09-13-2004 - 12:45pm
How awful for you but how familiar to me. There is the remote possibility that he may slowly begin to trust you and come round to believing in you and letting go of his past but i'm under the impression that just won't happen for a long time. My experience shows that it just gets worse and you end up losing a lot of confidence in yourself and just going along with pleasing him just to make life easier. Losing your virginity was a very special thing to do but is he really the only man you will ever be with for the rest of your life? Be firm with who you are and if he loves you he will adapt a little to give you the benefit of the doubt. You need to consider the possibility that he'll only get more possesive and controlling through his own past hurt and you shouldn't allow yourself or your future to be an emotional rollercoaster. Good luck to you both...